11yro AHDH Please Help

[baseballmom]

Hello all. I been a way for a while and just found the new site. Anyways I need some help and suggestions from you all. My son is 11 he is ADHD and not on any medication. He has just started a new school year and my DH & I are having a very difficult time with him. He is very aggressive and is not able to concentrate long enough to do his homework.

I have been reading on-line that supplements of magnesium, B6,zinc, & omega 3 will help. However I have not been able to find out what amount should be given. He is such a good boy and has such a tender heart I just want to find something to help him without given him any prescription medications. I welcome your comments and if any of you ladies have the same problem please let me know what you have tried and how it has helped.

[luvmy4sons]

Well, first off big hug! I can SO relate! I home school four sons. Two of which have ADHD and dylexia. My 11 year old also has a language processing disorder. It is very trying at times! There are days when I just want to throw my hands up. Okay, to be honest, I want to throw them up against the wall. LOL! Joking. Would never do it.

I know what you mean about the sweet heart. I can hear your compassion in your vocie. I so understand it. When my 11 year old tears up from time to time because he is struggling so, it breaks me up! I want so much to make it easier for him. I want him to know how loved he is, how special he is, how precious in the sight of God. Then in the next moment I am ready to wring his neck! LOL!

I wish I could say I had the pefect answer for you. I do not. I use daily discipline, training, and lots and lots of instruction and repeating instructions and instruction and repeating instructions...get the idea? LOL! I pray a lot. I sigh a lot. I fail a lot. I try to laugh a lot too and give out hugs and praise when I can!

I have no quick pill that I can suggest for you. I just wanted you to know you are most definitely not alone and if you ever need to vent. I and many others on here, so get it. Love to you!

[baseballmom]

Leslie,

Thank you for your reply. It is good to know that I am not alone even though I feel like I am sometimes. Right now my son’s biggest problem beside the ADHA is his reading he has struggled for so long with reading and still does. His reading right now is at a low 2 grade reading level. I have tried so many different approaches to helping him with reading. He just gets so frustrated and says he just can’t do and gives up. I am scared to push him too much even though at times I do.

Another factor is that his younger sister who is 9 does not have any problems with school she is a straight A student. I now that bothers him also. He was held back in 1st grade due to his reading level and so now they are both in 4th grade (different classes). His school has been so good and is giving him extra help with his reading.

I also have talked to another mother at my church whose oldest son had the same problems and she suggested that I give him bee pollen in the morning. So I did some reading on the internet and found that a supplement of magnesium, b6, omega 3 & omega 6, & flaxseed will help children with ADHD and their concentration. So I ordered those in a powder form. I am going to mix it into a banana strawberry smoothie for him his favorite. I will see how that works for him. I am not going to tell his teacher what I am doing and give it a couple of weeks and then ask her if she has not mentioned something to me. I pray and ask God that this might work for him and give him some added concentration and focus so that he can perform better in school.

[luvmy4sons]

I did try the flax seed oil and the omega oils for a while. Maybe not long enough. I understand about comparisons. I tried really hard early on to teach my children not to compare themselves to each other. Being that mine all sit next to one another in our school room at home they do anyway. My oldest is the one who got everything easy, so it was hard for his younger brother NOT too, and then the one after him learned easily too. He knows that his younger brother in many ways is better than he was in lots of sujbects(and for years they did grammar together though he is two years older and his younger brother always out performed him), but over time he learned to accept himself for who God created him to be.

I am very honest with my two about their learning disabilitites. I tell them what they are and I tell them what they can expect from themselves( as well as that they might exceed expectations, but at least they are not shocked at their difficulties). I don't see it as labeling. My second son was relieved to know that someone understood why it was so hard for him to read. We talk all the time about dyslexia and ADHD.

This: http://www.lindamoodbell.com/ program helped my son jump from beign stuck at first grade level to third. Some schools use the LiPS program for a resource for their learning disabled children. I had to pay to attend a three day seminar and try to teach it to my son myself. We re-taught him in third grade the entire alphabet using his lips and tongue. It helped him a lot. I used it naturally when his younger brother showed signs of dylexia and he learned to read much easier because of it. I don't know if your son is dyslexic, but sometimes a difficulty with reading indicates they might have it. It comes in varying degrees, as I have seen with my two who are both dyslexic in very different ways.

We actually tried Ritalin for two weeks with my 16 year old when he was like 10 or 11. It was great the first day...like a miracle pill but it went down hill after that and we didn't want the headaches and the stomach pains and it wasn't helping that much. I have heard a simple cup of coffee can do wonders for them. I have actually resorted to that for the 11 year old as he seems to like it and asks for it now. I don't see much of a difference. That is the problem. These supplements will result in some differences maybe but nothing drastic. There is no cure. Nothing you give them is going to make it all go away and suddenly be gone.

I try to remember this is the plan God has for my sons. There is a reason and it is good, acceptable and perfect. He challenges those he expects great things from. It is okay that they are who they are. It will all work out in the end. It will. I have bad moments where I just don't believe that and get very fearful. I just have to keep looking up and not inward and not outward at the tumultuous waves all around me! Love and hugs!