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juliarose
09-16-2006, 03:07 AM
THis is the first year I have not been pregnant or nursing since 2000. My youngest will be two oct. 11th. When I joined here she was a few weeks old and I was in a whole new world of three kids in diapers. Now I feel like a seasoned traveler thru the vast and slippery and overly-critisized terriane of mothering young children, and I have emerged 20 years older than I was five years ago. :?

But I seriously never thought I'd ever be typing these words. I knew eventually one day it would come, the day I would not be waking up in the middle of the night to nurse, change diapers, try to decipher what that cry means, i.e., ear-ache? gas? teething? fever? some mysterious illness that no one has ever heard of and that could have been totally prevented if only she would have had a better mother?

But seriously, I can say, and I know everyone said this to me and now I CAN SAY IT!

IT GOES BY FAST.

I think the reason it was so hard for me is not hte actual work of it, which was daunting and unbearable at times, but it was the constant nagging feeling that 'what if I was doing it wrong?' Does Mr. and Mrs. Jones raise their kids like me? Am I going to raise a god-hating criminal that will blame all their bad choices on how much Elmo I let them watch and the fact that we don't sit at the table every night? (not that if you have a god-hating criminal for a child you did something wrong, I don't really believe that.)

Does or did anyone else feel this way? I think it is because I was raised in a divorced home from a very young age and then by a single dad and have no idea how a family functions. Should I birng this to a counsler? Are you all bored to tears? Should I go type the rest of this laying down on my leather office couch? (No, I don' t really have a office couch. :) )

Well, this is my ode to leaving the world of infants and infant things and issues and concerns. I truely never thougt I'd see that day when "how do you put your baby to sleep or 'babywise' or nursing concerns would not rule the conversation. But it is here.

THere is a season for everything.....

luvmy4sons
09-16-2006, 08:52 AM
Yes, I remember going to hubby and asking, "Do you want any more? The youngest is 2." I had hever gone more than 2 years without being pregnant. We had 4 boys in 6 years. :D

What is odd is, that before you know it, you will not only be out of baby talk you will be out of toddler talk and out of pre school talk! My youngest will be 11 in October! My oldest is 17 ( the other two are 15 and 12) In 2 years I will have 4 teenage sons! I remember way back, I mean WAY back, thinking about how I would have 4 teenagers at once; and it seemed SO FAR AWAY! And now it is here upon me. :shock: Soon I will be sitting in my rocking chair and my grandson will be a teenager and it will seemed to have passed just as fast!

So I am with ya juliarose! Where does the time fly? But yesterday, the school day was so arduous that time seemed as if it were standing still! LOL! :lol:

JeanineAnne
09-16-2006, 10:04 AM
Oh Julia!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've missed you terribly!! How in the world are you???

I remember going through something similar when I finally weaned my youngest. For seven years I was either pregnant or nursing. I promise you will adjust quickly and even enjoy the next could years until the preteen stuff starts!!! ;)

Most importantly I just wanted to say HI and let you know how wonderful it was this morning to see a post from you!!!!!! Hugs!

tobikay
09-16-2006, 10:23 AM
I feel for you girls.
I separated my children more than you guys. After DS was born I said that I was done with children, that is until 7 1/2 years later when *surprise* I guess I wasn't done after all. But now that DS is 12 and DD is 4 (going on 16 I think...if she is like this now, what am I going to do when hormones kick in and add to the drama) I can't believe they are growing up so quick. I think that before we know it, DH and I will be sitting here alone, while our babies are out starting their own lives, and we will wonder what happened, where did they go?

Ashlee
09-16-2006, 11:40 AM
Hi Julia, its good to see you back. :D

Ok... you ladies almost had me in tears. I am half way through my 3rd pregnancy, and my youngest right now is only 9 months old... my oldest just turned 3. Things are moving so fast.. I don't know how I'm going to cope with 3 young ones... but I also dont know how I'm going to cope with 3 teenagers! That scares me more than anthing... and its inevidable. They are all going to grow up and I am responsible for how they turn out. I am thankful I have the Lord to guide me because I would be lost otherwise.

09-16-2006, 07:40 PM
I can only imagine how hard this would have been!

DH and I HAD to have our kids longer apart because we had a set of twins, now almost 4 years ago, and at the time we were told it was an 80% chance of conceiving another set (4 kids in diapers???)

That turned out to be untrue (the 80%), a multiple birth researcher told us it was more lie 4% - so our twins are just off 4 and we're having another baby in a WEEK.

I actually found it more difficult having two babies once they were out of the NB stage and was constantly FREAKING OUT about not being able to meet emotional needs more than anything.

I totally hear you on the overly criticised thing too! -

Despite all the feelings you had in the past, I bet you are an incredibly strong woman who has done an amazing job with the kids :wink:

juliarose
09-17-2006, 01:25 AM
Hey Jeanine and Ashlee and all you wonderful ladies, I have missed you too!!!!! Ashlee I did not know that you were pregnant I don't think. CONGRATS! MAybe I knew, how far are you?

I am in a bible study with moms who all have grown kids and they say things like " My son and I are really starting to connect." and I am like, do you ever stop connecting? I am going to miss my little boys!
Jeanine, seven years? I will stop feeling sorry for myself and my boobs. :) Thanks for saying hi, I am sure to find you somewhere else on here!

Ashlee
09-17-2006, 11:33 AM
Hey Jeanine and Ashlee and all you wonderful ladies, I have missed you too!!!!! Ashlee I did not know that you were pregnant I don't think. CONGRATS! MAybe I knew, how far are you?

Aww, thanks Julia. :D I am 20 weeks already... its so hard to beleive I'm half way there. Anyway.. its ok that you didn't know. I was MIA for a while and just came back a few weeks ago. I'm here to stay this time though.. I hope!