Things you never dreampt you'd say...

[Timmys mom]

until becoming a mom.

I find myself saying crazy things sometimes, and I wondered what crazy things you guys found yourselves saying. Some things I say all the time now:

"I'm not a Jungle Gym!" (When Timmys climbing on me)

"I'm not a tissue" (That one kind of expalins itself :wink: )

[~Tara~]

ewwww hehehe on the 'tissue' Oh yes I hear ya LOL

OH there are all kinds of things..things we would laugh at our parents for saying then here we are saying the same things to our kids. But darn if I'm not drawing a blank Ack!

"I'm gonna knock you into next week" I think is said quite a bit around here

"Close your mouth and eat"

I know there's more, I just can't remember them now when I'm put on the spot LOL

[PianoMama]

kinda on the same wave length - something i never thought i'd DO:

lick my finger to remove something from ds's face!

WOW!!!

[Timmys mom]

I've done that too, or pull a booger out of him nose with my finger!


also have said "Don't pee on mommy"
"Don't hit me with your milk"
"Don't sit on my head."

[Jackay]

I thought I would never be caught in a stall talking LOUDLY to my 3 year old, trying to coax him into going poop on the potty...and high fiving him for doing so while walking out of the public restroom, with the [whatconfused] strangest looks. :D

"Do I look like an ATM to you?"

"If I have to come up there, you better be into some fast prayin'!"

"Stop hitting your brother!"

"Woah, someone's ripe." [flagsurrender]

[jengrant]

I never thought I would ask "Do you have a poopy?" Oh how things have changed!

[Godzgirl]

I never thought i would be making silly faces and saying silly things to get a smile from my babies. I would see other parents do it before i was a mom and i thought it was funny but here i'am doing it now. LOL!

[ChamomileFriend]

I never realized how many conversations could even be had about baby poop - we talk about it almost every day - "woah that's a blueberry poop!", "pizza poop time!" , etc :lol:

Also saying things like, "ok, we can't eat mommy's nose!" when he was younger and still putting EVERYTHING in his mouth. PTL he now knows what is edible and what is not :)

some of the things i have had to say as a teacher have surprised me also, like "no humping tables and chairs in school!"

[JoyLynn]

some of the things i have had to say as a teacher have surprised me also, like "no humping tables and chairs in school!"

Hilarious! [rofl]

How bout:

Please wait til I'm done goin potty. [whatheadagainstthewall]

I can't hear you, I'm in the shower! I still can't hear you!! WHAT?!!? OPEN-THE-DOOOR!!! [whatheadagainstthewall] [rotfl]

Do NOT make me come in there! :lol:

I'm done, which means you are too.

Let me see your teeth.

What's that in your hair?

Are those my shoes?

Is that my shirt you just spilled on?

Who took my scissors?

WHERE is MY tape?

Scotty, you may not steal hair from Tissy's head just to see if it really springs back when you pull on it. [whatsmack]

[rofl]

I love every insane, crazy minute! [lovesmile]


Joy [welcomewave]

[Timmys mom]

some of the things i have had to say as a teacher have surprised me also, like "no humping tables and chairs in school!"



[rotfl] Thats funny!

I gotta say most of these things sound normal to me now. It's amazing how having a kid changes everything.

[luvmy4sons]

some of the things i have had to say as a teacher have surprised me also, like "no humping tables and chairs in school!"

Hilarious! [rofl]

How bout:

Please wait til I'm done goin potty. [whatheadagainstthewall]

I can't hear you, I'm in the shower! I still can't hear you!! WHAT?!!? OPEN-THE-DOOOR!!! [whatheadagainstthewall] [rotfl]

Do NOT make me come in there! :lol:

I'm done, which means you are too.

Let me see your teeth.

What's that in your hair?

Are those my shoes?

Is that my shirt you just spilled on?

Who took my scissors?

WHERE is MY tape?

Scotty, you may not steal hair from Tissy's head just to see if it really springs back when you pull on it. [whatsmack]

[rofl] I love every insane, crazy minute! [lovesmile]



Joy [welcomewave]

It is good to see you back on Joy. I say so many of those especially the Where is my tape? is that a home schooling one?

[JoyLynn]

Hi, Leslie! :D I'm so happy to see you, too. :D Yah, I was actually going to ask if I'm the only one who has the tape problem. I even buy the kids their own tape and they go through it so fast, they're back to mine in a heartbeat. :roll:

[hug]

Joy [welcomewave]

[Madre]

Leslie and Joy, when you were talking about the tape I thought you meant something different similar to what we do. :lol: We say "Let me get the tape" when we have to revisit an issue (like when one of the kids has selective memory).

Because I'm the mom.

Wear your seat belt.

Call me when you get there.

Assorted. (This is used when someone asks, "What's for dinner?" and I am fixing a dinner of "assorted" leftovers.)

Hurry up. Other people have to take showers.

Other people live here, too. (Used if someone doesn't change the tp roll or leaves a sliver of soap for the next guy.)

Sit down and read a book. (Used by me when the boys were younger and I didn't want them to wrestle in the living room.)

Go out in the yard and do that. (Used by dh when the boys wanted to wrestle in the living room.)

[harmony5]

I find myself saying these a lot:

I know I have 2 ears but I can only hear one person at a time.

Did you not see that phone plastered to the side of my head when you decided to be so loud!

I'm so glad you weren't my mother's child. You wouldn't have liked it very much.


Lori :D

[Gracie]

"Get that hand outta that butt!"

...lol...my DD will sometimes point to or rub her booty after she uses the potty...eeek.... [whatwacko]

[Timmys mom]

You need sleep, you're not a robot.

[BlessedMommy]

(During diaper changes) "You're going to have a nice clean rear end, isn't that wonderful?"

(When she's screaming loudly) "Crab-ola!"

(While she's eating) "Breasty burger is yummy, isn't it? You like it, you KNOW you like it. Breasty burger will make you grow big and tall."

(When I desperately want her to go to sleep) "You are getting VERY sleepy, your eyelids are getting VERY heavy...."

[myjoyoverflows]

"Does that toe taste yummy?" (she's found her toes and enjoys them VERY much!)

"Trust me, you DON'T wanna eat that!" (I think that I've said that few times with different things)

"I swear, you're gonna give me a hickey on my hand!" (not totally sure, but I think that she might be teething and she sure like to suck and chomp on just about everything!)

[RhysMom]

I just got done reading the Joel Ostean book so now I find that I say a quote that his father said to him, "I'm gonna beat a little blessing." Usually that gets her to act right.

Sara

[wesleysmom0604]

Money doesn't grow on trees!

[Wikokopelli]

The other night I said something and right away thought, I've got one!

"Just because there's food on the table, doesn't mean dinner's ready!"

as my almost 2 yr old was climbing onto his seat and pulling at the dishes of food that was already on the table...

Never thought I'd have a "weird comment" to contribute to any of these types of posts! :lol:

Kat

[Crissyanna]

Please make a burpy (Dainyah hates to burp now. However, then it struck me, in a few years, will I be telling her to not do it?)

You are ok. Really, you are ok! When I put her in the swing, and she starts wailing while I am trying to get the dishwasher loaded or laundry in.

And I agree, I have had more conversations about her bowel movements than I ever thought possible. Are you done yet? Are you just waiting for me to change that dipe so you can fill another one (said as she gives me a grin, and has a glint in her eye. Then, within five minutes of getting changed, she grins even bigger, gets this total look of concentration and then curls her legs towards her stomach and lets it rip.)

[mamallama]

"Take that finger out of your nose"

"Get your head out of my butt" (-sometimes dd likes to come up behind me in the kitchen and lean into me. No idea why!)

[jen1981]

Someone needs an attitude adjustment on the seat of understanding!
DON"T EAT THAT!!!!!
Hands to yourself. (ALL the time)
What is going on!
I am the boss!

[Godzgirl]

Don't worry mommy's going to clean you up right now (after they had thrown up [whateww] ) This happened yesterday before thanksgiving dinner.

[SoapLady]

When I realize that it's eerily quiet in the house--"Whatever you are doing, stop it RIGHT NOW". Usually, ds needs to be corrected but twice now I've poked my head around the corner and found him quietly reading a book. :oops:

[meg]

Today's weirdest comments -

"Why do you have bacon in your armpit?" just as we were finishing breakfast, and

"Put the penguin down!" when we were in a toy store later on today :lol:

[jessgr]

Fingers outta the nose!

[jengrant]

"Pooh bear does not eat cat food!"

Said this yesterday as ds was trying to feed his pooh bear toy.

[pioneerchristianmomof3]

" Because I'm the mom,that's why" :oops: :roll: I always hated that when my mom said it!

[shaynes08]

Said this morning after church, in the car, to my 5 yo son:

"Get that stick out of your nose!"

[Tricia2]

Let's see I am sure there are quite a few:

Please stop playing in the trash can

Get your hands out of the toilet bowl please

I will have to think about this one some more..lol

[hosh]

I constantly refer to myself in the third person and I hate it!

"Get back on that booby!" is a common one.

My DH and I made up a chant for my son that goes "Poop it out, poop poop it out!" and includes a little dance. Never would have thought I'd be cheering my son on while he poops... :lol:

[kanaclark]

My biggie here is:

I pushed your big head out, and I can knock it out, too.

and then

This is the Clark family and I'm your mother. I'm not the cashier at Burger King.

If you can't blow it out, leave it in there. or sometimes, my dh will ask the kids if their "diggin' for gold"

guess that's all I can think of

~Kana

[4Angelz]

"Because I said so!"

"Get your hand out of your pants!" :shock:

"Don't pick your nose... that's yucky!"

"You want some milky?" (Breastmilk)

"Do you want to eat eat?" (I do the repetition thing on one word a lot.) :?

"Did you make a stink stink?"

"Get off of your sister!"/"Get off of your brother!"

"You're not the mommy..."

"I love you thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissssssssssssss much!" :wink:

[RhysMom]

My dd calls kisses, moochies so I am always asking her to give Mommy "mooshies."

We have this little game where I say, "Hey Rhyanne" and she says, "What?" Then I reply, "I love you" and all she can say back is "tooooo"

"Mommy always wins"

[EvaS]

One thing I never thought I'd say

"Abigail, your corn on the cob is not a hammer". :lol:

I said that tonight as she was banging her corn on the cob off of a video. She doesn't actually eat much of the corn, she just likes to act like she does :lol:

[SupermansLady]

To DH this weekend in front of the 4, 3 and 2 year old boys:

"Get the green beans out of your nose, you are not a walrus!"


He thought it was cheap entertainment while I was cooking dinner, I thought it was disgusting. I don't know if I'll ever eat a green bean again. And yes, all 3 of the little ones tried to do it as soon as I put their plates in front of them.

Men....they are children til the day they die!

[kanaclark]

that's too cute.

[savedbygrace]

"Get your head out of my butt" (-sometimes dd likes to come up behind me in the kitchen and lean into me. No idea why!)

Rofl! My dd does the same thing! And I say the same thing!
The other thing is "can I bite you"? and what's funny is my dd who is 3 will say "Yes, but not too hard!"