that being pregnant means I want to be bombarded by people imparting their "wisdom" in my direction??? ....oh my goodness! They are going to be soo close together!(and that's a bad thing??).........good luck (implying I'm obviously going to need it)..........and my favorite - maybe its twins! (I've heard that one more than once just today!) sheesh. People drive me crazy some days.

I hear ya on this one. I never had so much unsolicited "advice/wisdom" thrown in my direction than when I was pregnant. LOL It's amazing the kinds of things perfect strangers tell you when you are prego haha.

because they think that even though you obviously have two other perfectly normal, taken care of, little ones in tow along with the baby bump, that they know more than you and should share their inteligence with you.

(when in reality, they probably don't even have ONE child of their own, LOL) I take advice from three people. My granny, she raised 5 of her own, and two grandchildren, my husbands grandma, she raised 7 of her own, and my mom, she raised me, LOL)

I don't know about people who've never had kids advising those who have. I don't remember encountering that, myself. Unless, of course, I asked for the opinions of my friends (I was the first of my friends to have a baby), which I did. I was trailblazing for all of us and was pretty nervous. Definitely *sought* the opinions of trusted sources, whether they had kids or not.

As for people who *have* had children... I don't know. I just think it's something God places in us to share what we've learned with others. Once we've wrestled with our own problem(s), it seems kinda natural to want to help someone else out and maybe save them a headache or two, kwim?

Seems to me the key is boundaries. Recognizing when someone is actually *asking* for advice, or even open to it. I think the God-given desire to help someone else's life to be easier and to share what you've learned is a wonderful thing. On the other hand, not understanding or respecting the boundaries of others by stepping into their world to offer unsolicited advice, I think likely stems from being uneducated about what people are looking for. In other words, I think they really believe they're helping, or encouraging, or being a blessing to you.

I guess I've heard stories of people who are mean and bossy stepping in and trying to make someone feel stupid or inept. Terrible if you have someone like that in your own family. I don't know if I've ever really encountered that one either.

[heart]

Joy [welcomewave]

What I found strange was how complete strangers would come up and pat or rub my belly. :???: not that i really minded per se, but it felt kinda weird. "um, yes, that there's my navel, yes indeed..."

I haven't had strangers make comments this time 'round....yet. I think you are probably right, Joy, that people are just trying to share. I just find it annoying when the "tone" of the sharing implies that I'm stupid for having another baby (either period or with the other two still so young). You know, the "good luck....your life is about to be more miserable than it already is" attitude. I am SO happy to be having another baby. This one, along with ds and dd were all planned. And as for the twins comment, its unlikely, but they would be a blessing despite the added challenge. (besides, I can't exactly in good conscience say anything bad about twins since I am one! ;) )

I know what you mean, Kim. I've heard that tone before, too. I feel sorry for those people. They must have been at the very end of their rope with their kids. I think a lot of people *are* feeling desperate trying to raise their kids. Honestly, I bet some can't imagine that some of us don't feel wildly out of control and hating every minute of it. It's so sad. I just try to be calm and let them witness the peace we have in our family. We let that speak for us. A living testimony is more powerful than a verbal one, any day.

*smooch*

[loveyou]

Joy [welcomewave]

I haven't had strangers make comments this time 'round....yet. I think you are probably right, Joy, that people are just trying to share. I just find it annoying when the "tone" of the sharing implies that I'm stupid for having another baby (either period or with the other two still so young). You know, the "good luck....your life is about to be more miserable than it already is" attitude. I am SO happy to be having another baby. This one, along with ds and dd were all planned. And as for the twins comment, its unlikely, but they would be a blessing despite the added challenge. (besides, I can't exactly in good conscience say anything bad about twins since I am one! ;) )

Um, what do they mean about "close"? People are so weird! I'm TTC right now and if I got preggo today, my kids would be 27 months apart. If I calculate right, Fiona and the new baby will be 29 months apart. So what's wrong with that? Why is that considered close? Um, did people want you to have your kids 5 years apart?

Wow, this topic hits a nerve with me. I hope that nobody makes those comments to me when/if I get preggo! Yikes.

Sometimes people don't think! I got a comment once, " You look too young to be a mom!", from must some random women at Walmart! First of all, I am 30 years old, secondly, even if I was 16, what business is that of hers!

I know....crazy....the lastest I got was this past week. "You're going to have THREE kids and you are ONLY 28????" ....How old do you think I should be? lol

One of the THE best comebacks I've ever heard to the "You're going to have your hands full" or "Boy, you must have your hands full" is a variation of: "Yes, and my heart will be to."

Amen to that.

" You look too young to be a mom!"

This one I got a lot. Now I get, 'you look too young to have a 15 yr. old.' I take both as huge compliments. :mrgreen: Now, if they'd said I *was* too young to be a mom, I may have taken offense.

[lovesign]

Joy [welcomewave]

One of the THE best comebacks I've ever heard to the "You're going to have your hands full" or "Boy, you must have your hands full" is a variation of: "Yes, and my heart will be to."

Amen to that.

I think it's a good thing to have your hands full. :-D

I think it's a good thing to have your hands full. :-D

Yeah, you know what they say, Idle hands are the devil's workshop.