Well I've said from the beginning this one was a bit tricky. :-) This is the first time I STILL have no real schedule. I'm open to (and need) some flexibility but I really need some sort of pattern to follow. I've often thought we had this issue partly due to her unique temperment and partially because I sometimes had to wake her to do runs back and forth to school and other errands. Now that we're homeschooling we don't have those issues. Is it too late to get her with the program?

She tends to eat at regular, fairly consistent intervals (still nurses 4 or so times per day, also eats three 'food meals, one bottle at night). She often takes only 1 nap per day, usually in the pm but it could be right after lunch or late afternoon. I've tried putting her down at a consistent time but she usually sits right up and screams (I mean scream here-not crying) and will not give in. After about 10 mins. or so I'll give up and try again the next time she gets fussy. *Today she went down at 10:30 AM and has slept for about 90 mins. That's unheard of around here, but I wonder what our afternoon and evening will be like.

She gets up at completely different times every morning as well. Sometimes at 5:30, sometimes 7:30, or anything in between.

She goes through phases where goes down easily at night. She'll get drowsy at breast or bottle and we can put her down. Then (like the last week or so) she'll have a spurt of fighting that as well. It goes similiarly to nap time sometimes taking 3+ attempts before getting her down.

I blamed her lack of daytime routine on my schedule, but our night routine is calm and consistent: supper, bath, quiet play/story, bottle, and bed. She has no attachment item. Unlike my others she rejected paci, has no blanket, and no favorite toy.

I wouldn't mind so much if she was fairly content, but on days when she gets less sleep she is clearly as miserable as the rest of us. Any suggestions?

my son was like that. I think it's great that you have a nighttime routine & I think if you're consistent with that, it will help the daytime , nap routine. My son wasn't consistent at night until around 7 months. Then we gently worked on the day routine. It got much , much better around 11-12 months. I didn't force it, I just encouraged it. For instance - I didn't have to make sure he ate at the same time every day, but we did it around the same time, as he seemed to be hungry. Then I tried to get him to nap around the same time everyday. It took time & maturity in his sleep patterns..but eventually he came around. He still doesn't nap at the same time every day..but it's in the ballpark anyway.
You could check out Pantley's "No Cry Sleep Solution" - she has great tips on routines (vs strict schedules) on eating, feeding, and napping.
HTH

We have some Pantley sleep solution book excerpts:
http://www.christian-mommies.com/authors/epantley/

Thanks for the advice Kahili and to Rachel for the links!

With my boys, I've never wanted a schedule so much as a routine. With homeschooling, I like doing things in roughly the same order, but I also like the flexibility to push things off an hour if I need to.

I found the best luck when they were babies, by adhering to the routine of things rather than the actual time of things in order to get them to nap and bedtime at normal times.

For instance, I did like you for bedtime, no matter what "time" it actually ended up to be. I didn't enforce an actual time until closer to 2 years old since they were both so changeable with their sleep habits prior to that (though we did make sure it was prior to 10pm, LOL, so DH and I could chat alone a bit). When the boys were babies like the age of yours, that usually consisted of a bath, a snack, maybe a book, prayer, and nursing to sleep. For naps, I just watched for the signs of tiredness, and I had a little nap routine as well. The one that worked the best at the age of your baby was telling baby that it would be naptime in a few minutes, and then taking baby into my room and lying down with him and nursing him to sleep, or if he didn't want to nurse to sleep, I had a special song I always sang to him, and I'd just sing to him while we both lay next to each other, or I'd tell him stories or even just lie quietly until he drifted off to sleep. Sometimes it did take upwards of 20 min., sometims 30 in the beginning, but it was well worth it because it established the routine of napping.

I won't kid you though, there were days where baby just wouldn't conform to a nap though, and on those days, I found it easiest to either decide to run errands because I knew he'd fall asleep in the car and I could shop with him in his stroller, or I'd just put him in a ring sling and I'd wear him around the house if he was fussy but refusing to sleep. Somthing about the closeness of mom and the warmth and rhythmic walking and such usually put him to sleep, and I'd just wear him while he slept, or try to slip him out and into bed.

My kids sleep cycles changed a LOT throughout the first year, and even quite a bit in their second year as well, so for us, it was easier to really work on developing a routine that helped them fall asleep whenever they happened to be tired, so they knew what was always coming, and then that really helped when we added an actual bed "time" later on when you could count on their bodies normally waking at XYZ time almost every single day.