Baby Shower???

[SupermansLady]

Baby Shower question here for you girls.

How do you feel about showers for 2nd, 3rd, 4th children and so forth???

My son will be 4 this fall, so when this baby is born, it will have been 3 1/2 years since I had him. I wasn't expecting to have any more children so I gave away most of my baby things (car seats, bassinet, crib, walkers, tons of clothes and toys). So, as I am approaching this ones birth, I find that I have very little left for the first 6 months or so. I am adapting to that, and being thankful for what I do have. A coworker has given me a bassinet that is only a year old and my cousin gave me her crib from her now 2 1/2 year old. So, the basics...I guess I have.

I am not upset that I haven't been and won't be thrown a shower. I understand most of the reasons (child so soon after 1st, same gender, older brothers hand me downs) but my husband doesn't understand at all and is really mad about it. His youngest 2 sons mother was thrown 2 showers with each child and they are only 2 years apart...so he doesn't understand why nobody has done that for me.

First - my family and I (parents mainly) aren't on really great terms and my sister doesn't want to get in the middle of it, so none of them want to throw me a shower (not close enough to cousins to expect it from them). I have a few close friends who might, but all of them are really busy with their own kids and one actually told me last week to make sure my mom sent her an invite to the shower...what an awkward moment that was :? . I work with a few ladies, but none of them are very close to me and it just isn't their thing. They dont' even acknowledge birthdays around here??? The only others who might are the ladies in my Bible Study group at church...and they are the ones who have said it isn't "kosher" to throw a shower within 5 years if your 2nd child is the same gender.

I have come to terms with this and am pretty cool about it. God has provided for us and will continue to do so...but what do you ladies think? Any good ideas of how I can get my hubby to calm down about this???

TIA!

[mamallama]

No clue..but personally, I think I would be a little disappointed.

The only others who might are the ladies in my Bible Study group at church...and they are the ones who have said it isn't "kosher" to throw a shower within 5 years if your 2nd child is the same gender.

I've never heard of this!!! My church throws showers for each child regardless. Seems kinda weird that the ladies at church would say that. Have you talked to the Pastor's wife about it and explained your situation?

[SupermansLady]

The church I attend is fairly large (most Sunday over 300). So, the Bible Study groups are pretty much the only way you make close friends. Our pastor is relatively new (less than 1 year) and his wife just moved here locally to be with him. She had remained at their former home until the end of the school year as she is a teacher. So, she isn't easy to talk to.

I think part of that excuse is the fact that it's such a large church they'd be throwing a baby shower ever couple of weeks if they did for everyone. Currently, we have 13 babies under 9 months in our nursery at church! So...I can understand that too.

That is what I miss about small churches.

[MommaBear]

Well I was disappointed (DH was angry)when no one threw a shower for DD. Yes both kiddos are close in age (17 months) but since it was a GIRL... We still had to get another crib (gave DS's away to a needy family), clothes (as all DS's had trucks/baseballs...), another carseat (mouse ate DS :roll: ), bedding, double stroller...So basically it was like havin a FIRST munchkin. Besides the fact I had/have nothing to write in her baby book under that section. :cry:

So to avoid that THIS time (and since we REALLY don't need anything this time because I saved all DS's stuff) I am throwing an end of the summer/back to school/"Sprinkling" (no Shower)Party. Basically a BBQ with family and friends and a Baby cake. No presents, no money. Just food and celebration of life. Maybe that would be an idea for ya. Have a "Sprinkling" Party. Just a time to celebrate with family and friends the gift that God has given to you. HTH! Blessings to you! ~Kerri