Stupid comments made to pregnant women

[BlessedMommy]

Here's a rant: Have you ever noticed that when you get pregnant before others think you should (or have more babies than the American standard) that you get a lot of dumb and hurtful comments?

Here's a couple (Roughly paraphrased) made to us:

1) "Was it an accident baby?"

(No, it wasn't in the sense that they were thinking of, and it wasn't in any sense. God plans for each life that comes on the earth and there are no accidents with Him.)

2) (Spoken to my husband) "Hi daddy. Not that I don't think you're nuts for having it so soon."

(Who in the world created the standard that it's wrong to have a baby 9 months after you get married?)

And after we have more than 2 or 3 kids, should God so bless, I can just see the comments we might get from that point on.

As a matter of fact, my childbirth class teacher just got pregnant again and her MIL was downright mean about it. I believe that she called her son an "idiot" or something like that, since they were going to have another baby. Apparently her MIL thought that over 2 years apart between children wasn't an acceptable spacing or something like that, and decided to throw her 2 cents in. What has society degenerated to when we view babies and pregnancy in this light?

Argh. What are the most stupid comments that anyone has ever made to you ladies and how did you deal with them?

[Crissyanna]

When we got pregnant the first time, we dealt with all the "so soon?" stuff (we got pregnant on our first month anniversary of marriage). Then, to top it off, when we called my sister to tell her, she told me that there were ways of "taking care of that now." I was ready to blow my stack. Then, when we lost that baby, few people consoled us or did much. People at hubby's school prayed and let us know about that. My family took the news and has yet to bring it up on their own again (I do occasionally to see if they will talk about it.) Hubby's mom was great through it all though. This time around, it wasn't so bad. A few people were like, didn't you just lose one? (we lost the first in Sept. Got preggo again in Jan.). People are crazy. Those who seemed the most concerned with our orignal "timing" were pretty excited about this baby. I wish they would make up their minds.

Crystal

[BlessedMommy]

Crystal, I'm sorry to hear about your sister's reaction. Is she a Christian? That seems pretty strange to me that she recommended that you have an abortion. Ouch! I'll bet that your sister's glad that your mom didn't have an abortion when she was pregnant with her. :)

Yeah, the "so soon" comments have to have been one of the most common for us too. Personally, I think that if a person is not able to handle having a child conceived at the consummation of their marriage, they should very seriously rethink getting married. It's frustrating to me when others think that they know better than we do when we should have kids, etc.

On the positive side though, when we went over and told our Christian neighbors and landlord about our pregnancy, they started jumping up and down and screaming with joy for us. They truly believe that children conceived at any point during a marriage are a blessing, and their attitude shows when they're so excited about my growing belly, the baby moving, and obviously eager for us to have it. So thank God that everyone isn't like that!

[meg]

Our eldest son was born just shy of 2 weeks after our first anniversary. I was 22 when we got married, dh was 24. So, we were 23 and 25 when ds was born.

One woman I worked with (at church offices, a christian lady) asked me straight out "Didn't the pill work for you?" To which I replied "I wasn't on the pill, we wanted a child straight away". Her reply? "Oh well. You won't have him (dh) all to yourself anymore you know." :o She was about 27, and single.

We had a few people assume it was an accident. One girl I knew actually said to my mum (who was over the moon at becoming a grandma!) "Oh, I guess that was an accident, then?" :o

I think people were even more horrified when we told them that it was planned. Up until then they just thought we were unlucky. Now they were thinking we were downright stupid :lol:

Our second son was born 2 years and 6 weeks after our first. We didn't get as many comments then, but still a few. Apparently, we were having them "too close together" Huh? Until you're paying our bills and raising our boys, what's it to you? Sorry, I know that's rude, but boy, it made me cranky!

Funny thing is, the boys are now 5 and 7, and people are asking "So, are you going to have a third?" :lol:

What some people don't know is that we felt, for health reasons (me) that it was wisest to have our children sooner rather than later. I have spinal problems (scoliosis) which resulted in surgery when I was 14. I've now got steel rods in my back, basically holding me straight. Each pregnancy puts a lot of strain on that. My first pregnancy wasn't too bad, but my second was really difficult. I've only got one ovary, due to a huge cyst that destroyed the other. So, for us, time was of the essence! Also, we were really clucky and wanted to start our family! :D

Because of the situation with my back, we decided it was wisest to stop at 2. As dh says, I've got to be able to look after the children we've already got, and he is terrified of something happening to me.

However, we shouldn't have to explain all of this to every person who feels they are justified in making unfavourable comments about decisions that we have made for our family. :?

So, yes, we did have people making comments to us too. Now, we just laugh. People told us "Oh, but you're so young, you won't get to travel/go out/etc." Well, the way we see it is that by the time our kids are young adults, we will still be young enough to travel or whatever, if we choose to.

You and your dh are the best people to make decisions (prayerfully) for your family. Not everyone else, no matter how entitled they may feel :wink:

Can you tell you touched a nerve? :lol: :lol:

[BlessedMommy]

LOL, Meg. I thoroughly enjoyed reading your post. Man, you can't please anyone. First, you get flak for having one too soon. Then you get flak for having them "too close together." Since when was a 2 year spacing unacceptable? I think that it all depends on whose opinion you consult. I agree with having kids while you're young. Then you have the energy to keep up with them.

I know what you mean about "being unlucky" or just "plain stupid." I make it clear to folks that our honeymoon baby wasn't a surprise, so they probably think that we're a little fruit loopy, but that's okay! We're the ones who have to raise our kid, not them. Sometimes I get stressed out because I second guess myself and buy into the "kids put a terrible stress on marriage" myth. How did things change for you and DH after you had your first baby?

Frankly, I did so much travelling and moving around before I was married that I'm quite happy to be in one place!! And who says that you can't travel with kids? Maybe my DH and I will become foreign missionaries some day....

[Godzgirl]

I got told comments like that when pregnant and afterwards! Pretty hurtful when it comes from family. :cry:

[kassismom]

Here's one that was asked of me:

early December, 2000-

The Idiot said: "Oh, when are your twins due? You don't have much longer do you".

Me- :evil: "Nope. A little less than 4 months." :evil:


My due date was March 28th. My daughter, just one daughter, was born on March 2nd.

Ugh don't even get me started on this, I still have so much trouble dealing with this issue even now!!!

We decided we wanted to start having kids 6 months after we got married, which was the RIGHT time for us.

I got from my sister "so you did it deliberately DID you?" (it annoyed me because she had a baby out of marriage and there is no father around, so not that I look down on her, I thought it was RICH coming from her mouth KWIM?... don't get me wrong I LOVE my sister!)

He went and told his parents we wanted kids so it was "You can;t have kids!"

So when we found out I was carrying twins it was "Oh, you will put a strain on your marriage, you won't cope" (yet no one EVER offered to help me with them!!!).... or the typical "better you than me" (It was like. Oh - no it would be more wonderful if I was sterile would it ???)

Someone came over to the house and said to my face "I don't know why you are going through with it, once one starts the other one will start" (yeah I was going to have an abortion at 30 weeks NOT!) - needless to say this person was absolutely banned from the house.

Anyway, the twins came along, and they are the light of our life - but from then on it was from MIL "Don't have any more kids!" or "are you having anymore kids?" - DON'T etc.

Oh it has also been stipulated by outsiders that I was a child bride because I got pregnant (?) - I was 24 when I got married thank you very much and a virgin bride!

We decided at the end of last year we definately wanted another baby (and if we got two again, well... we'd just live with that) - so we copped flack from his RICH sister who thinks people like "us" shouldn't have kids ever... meaning not rich - we certainly aren;t poor, but we aren;t busting at the seams with money... so we got the "you shouldn't be having any more kids, babies are expensive" - which is NOT entirely true, they are expensive if you do all the parephenalia and buy the most expensive of everything. There are ways around money issues by buying lower priced, second hand, hand me downs, or borrowing gear... etc.

Although only one person has asked me if it was a "suprise" lucky they didn't say "accident". Most of our friends knew we wanted another baby and as they all have young kids etc no one batted an eyelid. Most of the hassle comes from family or strangers.

I do get filthy looks when i am out and about with my kids and my bump, but I guess it is no worse then when I had them at 26 and looked 19...

My way of dealing with it now is I just keep focused on my kids when we are out and keep talking to them and act as if no one else is there, it doesn;t mean I don't catch glances, or whispers and get hurt by it by any means, but at least I pretend I am not phased!

MIL has tried to make a few negative remarks like "So how old will the twins be when the baby is born" and I say "Just shy of four"... and she will say "Oh... so that is not too close together" (in MIL language it means THEY ARE too close...).

UGH... !!! I don;t get in this planet why everyone is so busy and yet they still have time to try and dictate each others lives!

[meg]

I guess the biggest change was that we couldn't have "us" time whenever we wanted it. However, we did get "us" time, so knowing that made it OK.

For us, getting time together doesn't necessarily mean going out. Our boys go to bed pretty early (between 7 - 7.30pm), so we have "our" time every evening, which is a great way to connect and unwind before the end of the day.

Our boys are such a wonderful, wonderful part of our lives. If anything, they have drawn us closer. Seeing dh play with them, teach them things and love them makes me love him even more. And I know that when he watches me read to them, help them with homework, craft, etc, it fills him with love and pride in his family. Seeing your spouse playing with, or just spending time with, your child/ren is the most wonderful sight. It just fills you with so much love for them you'll think you're going to burst! :D

One reason we make sure we get "us" time, is, part from loving each other's company, we believe that the best place to raise children is in a loving, stable, Christian home, and that the best way to have a loving, stable, Christian home, is to have a strong marriage. We try to remember that we are not just mum and dad, but husband and wife as well, and for us, that relationship takes precedence over all else. We still have our hopes and dreams as a couple, as well as a family, if that makes sense.

Dh and I can't believe how quickly time is going by. He looked at me the other day and said "I swear you were 16 just yesterday" :lol:

I've often found (not in all cases, but in quite a few) that most people who question/put down your decisions are really feeling quite insecure about their own, and so feel the need to put others down to elevate themselves. In those cases, I just feel really sorry for them, and try not to let it affect my happiness :)

[kassismom]

Thought y'all could use a laugh there with my last response. Yes, I was huge.

But don't get me started on the comments thing, my mother treated me, well, not so good. Everybody asked me "so what are you gonna do".....like I thought there was some other "choice". Kill my child, no thank you. I hated those comments worse than anything else. There was just absolutely without a doubt no way. The nurses thought I was nuts when I refused the typical CVS and other types of screening to see if the baby was "normal". I told them forget it, I'm having this child regardless. The doctor was wonderful though, didn't even look at me funny. He just said "alright" and went right on with the office visit.

Oh and has anyone else mentioned the "pregnancy police"...???

Everyone on the planet saying what you should and shouldn't be doing?

I have been "told off" for doing house work in my first pregnancy because it "brings the baby on" BOSH!

When I went into pre-term which was because of carrying twins and over crowding it was blamed on me "bringing it on"

I have said to DH "no one is interfering from the family this time and if they do they are not welcome" I have also banned his family from sleeping at our house when they are in Perth because I don't need their tripe at this stage!!!

[harmony5]

Well, my first 2 were unplanned. I was very young and I am sure you can imagine all the comments I got!! I remember being so hurt back then because people would make comments about a "child having a child". I never asked anyone for approval of my behavior but it would have been nice if people wouldn't have been so mean!! :evil:

With my 3rd, a lot of people asked me things like if I was crazy or had I lost my mind. My MIL kept saying how I would be lucky if I was able to raise the 2 I had. She meant that things were so expensive, but still.

Now, we are ttc a fourth blessing and I can't believe the way people look at you like you have 3 heads or something!! People who know that we want another child think we are insane. It really makes me sick.

I agree with a pp who said that they shouldn't worry about it as long as they aren't paying my bills!! I also say they shouldn't worry about it because my children are mine. I don't fork them off on anyone and my dh and I love them and take care of them. So, if we want to have 15 children and the Lord chooses to bless us, why should anyone have anything negative to say about it? :roll:

When my SIL found out that we were ttc again, she looked at me with this crazy look on her face and said, "Are you serious?" all demeaning like. I said "I don't have any reason not to be serious" and I walked away. I was fuming!! :evil:

So, yeah, people are sometimes ignorant. I have never made a comment about anyone else's pregnancy and I never will! It is just rude and uncalled for. Like a pp said, children are blessings from God. Who are we to dispute or belittle that????

Sorry, I'll hop down now! [soapbox]

Lori :wink:

[kassismom]

Well, all those weird looks and less than nice comments for you ladies who have what society calls "too many" kids......they must have never read this. I hope it brings you some encouragement.

Proverbs 17:6 Children's children are the crown of old men; and the glory of children are their fathers.

Yeah Meg I completely identify with the description of the precious family time you have! (aside from all the trouble our respective families cause)

We take ours everywhere and have a lot of family time fun, but on the same token I believe to that it is very vital to have "us" time.

We do that at night too, or sometimes the twins are instructed to go and play in their playroom for a while.

We do get babysitters and have some time off too which is important to touch base in the marriage.

Ladies, it never ceases to amaze me how these people saying such negative remarks to us seem to imagine that this will make us better parents, or the world a better place LOL.

I look at Britney Spears and all the criticism she gets and I think "Do you all think you are making her a better mother to Sean Preston or something by hounding her?" ............

[meg]

I've come to the conclusion, after years of studying, that a lot of people are just plain crazy, and the rest? Well, they're just busybodies :lol:

Seriously though, it was mainly comments about "You won't be able to travel, or go out" that we got, and comments about it being an "accident" :roll:

Well, as for travelling, when our sons are 18 and 20, I'll be 43 and dh will be 45, and those numbers are looking younger and younger every year :lol:

As for an "accident", well, basically, how dare they call our precious boy an "accident", when the definition of accident is

An unexpected and undesirable event, especially one resulting in damage or harm;
An unforeseen incident;
Lack of intention

As I said, crazy people and busybodies :lol:

I SO know what you mean! The world isn't going anywhere, (in relation to travel), careers are always within reach, the mentality that the world comes to an end once you have kids is soooo shallow and deceptive.

How people think being a BIGGER person is staying solo and acting cagey and non-committal is just bizzare. I am not saying for one minute people who don't have kids or partners lives are less, I am talking about people who make out as though kids and marriage are a disaster!!!

It is an UnGodly selfish attitude, completely wordly (that children and marriage are a disaster)

To me having a successful family takes a lot of grit, hard work, determination and for each party to be a BIGGER person and submit over their will to make it all work.

People can have all the latest gear in the world, the biggest fanciest everything, BUT you can't BUY what we have you know?

[meg]

Yep, I know.

Just last night, dh and I were talking about this kind of thing. We remarked on how fast the years were going, and how compared to some people, it might appear that we weren't "going anywhere", just "plodding along" raising the boys etc, and how before we knew it, it would be our 20th wedding anniversary.

Dh then said to me, with tears in his eyes "If on our 20th anniversary, you can look me in the eyes, and tell me that you have loved me, every day, of every one of those 20 years, then my life will have been a success." :D

[soulmom]

Well, my first 2 were unplanned. I was very young and I am sure you can imagine all the comments I got!! I remember being so hurt back then because people would make comments about a "child having a child". I never asked anyone for approval of my behavior but it would have been nice if people wouldn't have been so mean!! :evil:

i'm totally tracking with you ladies. when i had my daughter at 17 i got nasty looks while i was pregnant and half the time when i was seen with my baby i was told what a cute little sister i had :roll: there were also a lot of people that assumed i was on welfare because i was an "unwed teen mother", but i never was, after i had my daughter i went to work full time to support us.

then a few years later I married a wonderful man and we wanted kids. we waited a year and got pregnant and all the family was happy and excited. then about a year ago our sex life was seriously suffering and we prayed about it and decided i should stop taking the pill because it was affecting my sex drive. we were new to nfp though and God used that to bless us with another baby. we got some pretty interesting and frankly dismaying comments from some of the family. my husband's step mom asked if we got the memo that they weren't allowed to have any more grandkids.

we currently live in a 2 br mobile home, so the question we got the most was "are you going to move into something bigger?" sorry, but no, we live in soCal and i'm taking a cut in hours after the baby comes. is there anything so wrong with 3 kids sharing a room? i hate to go all "when I was your age" but my mom lived in a room with 5 of her siblings, 2 in a full size bed and two sets of bunks... there is nothing wrong with my 3 sharing a room! there are 8 years between dd and ds and another 3 1/2 in between ds and baby ds.

i just went to a women's retreat with my mom's church last month and the winner there was "so this is it for you then?" to which i kindly responded, "probably not, we're just waiting to see what the Lord has for us"

and then of course there are all the lame-o comments from strangers about "having your hands full" and being "busy". it get's old, but i just smile and say what a blessing my kids are...

and Meg, a lot of people won't find that because they are so afraid to be taken in they can't be taken out (of their cynacism about love...) so count yourself blessed, as I do! And then all the other rubbish we Mum's are having to put up with will melt into nothing.

[BlessedMommy]

As for an "accident", well, basically, how dare they call our precious boy an "accident", when the definition of accident is

An unexpected and undesirable event, especially one resulting in damage or harm;
An unforeseen incident;
Lack of intention

As I said, crazy people and busybodies :lol:

AMEN! I think that calling a baby an accident is a very cruel thing to do. I don't mind it when people call a baby a surprise, because often surprises are very good things that you hadn't thought about wanting, but an accident? Last Friday, my husband got into a bad car accident, that totalled our car. He's lucky to have escaped it unhurt. How dare people even think about putting my or anyone else's baby on that same level? Argh.

AussieMum, I'm sorry about the stupid comments you got about your twins. Man alive, your MIL thinks that nearly 4 years between kids is too little. Next thing you know, she'll be wanting you to space them 20 years apart.

And it's irksome that people think that you've "thrown away your life." If it weren't for women just like us, the world population would cease to exist. I'm sure glad that my mom didn't think that having us kids was throwing away her life! She stayed home with us while we were little and poured her life into it and we were better off for it!

You know, I think that some of the sincerest congratulations that I get are from women who have infertility problems. They know how precious children are and they don't take them for granted.

For us, things were a little bit awkward, because we got multiple lectures before marriage on how we should wait to have kids. Hopefully people are getting the message that critical comments or lectures are not an effective form of birth control! :) LOL.

I just about busted my gut reading this thread. It's good to know that I'm not the only one who has faced this.

I know what you mean about being worried that people thought that you conceived your babies before marriage, AussieMom. I was 23 when I got married and a virgin, and sometimes stressed that people would think that I got pregnant before the wedding. If they ever did, I guess that's their business. I just hope that our baby doesn't decide to show up early! (It's due 9 months and 3 days after we got married)

[BlessedMommy]

my husband's step mom asked if we got the memo that they weren't allowed to have any more grandkids.


All I have to say to that is, "Oh my." That's pretty bad.

[Beck]

When we found out we were pregnant with Riley, Kevin had just lost job. So we didn't get any "Congratulations!". Instead, we got "If you're happy, so are we."

Amy, I can relate to the "big" comments!!! The other day, I was at the store and the lady asked me if I was due any day. I politely told her "Nope, in October" then quickly proceeded to inform her that my husband was 6'8" and the kid is big. Is the kid big? I don't know. It diverted the conversation, though, so that's what counts! :D

Everyone on the planet saying what you should and shouldn't be doing?
Oh man! You had to bring this up! :lol: Just a couple weeks ago, I was scolded by Kev's grandmother for picking Riley up! And of course, she had to do this in front of our entire family! So I simply said, "She's only 30 lbs, the doctor said I can lift 30 - 35 lbs." She stopped talking. :D

[BlessedMommy]

Beck, LOL. People seem to think that they know so well what we can and can't handle.

I suppose that they think that in the ideal world you'd have a good job, lots of money, not be newly married, have a big savings account, a house fully paid for, not get in any accidents or have any family problems during a pregnancy, not lose your job during a pregnancy, make sure that you have enough emergency supplies and food to last through any emergency, have at least 20 grand in the bank just for living off of if you did lose your job, have health insurance independent of your job that covers any and every maternity expense and above all make sure that you space your kids 5 years apart! :shock:

Then it would be the right time! Actually you'd probably get criticism for having them 5 years apart and get called "selfish" for not giving your child a sibling earlier. So you can't win for losing! :roll:

[Crissyanna]

Exactly. You can't please other people. (btw, my sis used to be a Christian, she is currently backslidden, and she used to be anti-abortion, now, well, that is quite questionable. She swears she is never having kids, so who knows). Hubby's family is more supportive with each day that goes by (his mom has bought so much baby stuff, including what I think may be all the diapers this kid will ever need. We could probably open a baby resale shop at her house right now). My family, well, they are coming along, slowly. I know if we get preggo again with in two years of having this one, I'll never hear the end of it from them, but that is their problem. Not mine. I can always hang up the phone on them if I have to.

The whole unsolicted advice on what you can and "can't" do while pregnant gets frustrating. Hubby won't let me lift much of anything (I try to not complain. He does more work around the house that way..... :lol: ). Then, I was told to not raise my hands above my head. Because that will wrap the cord around the baby's neck and kill it. Then, I keep thinking of all the stuff my great-grandma used to say about pregnancy and just have to laugh. She believed that you can't take a shower or bath while pregnant, because the water hitting your stomach would cause brain damage. That, if you looked at a disabled person, your baby would have that disability. Stuff like that.

[BlessedMommy]

Exactly. You can't please other people. (btw, my sis used to be a Christian, she is currently backslidden, and she used to be anti-abortion, now, well, that is quite questionable. She swears she is never having kids, so who knows). Hubby's family is more supportive with each day that goes by (his mom has bought so much baby stuff, including what I think may be all the diapers this kid will ever need. We could probably open a baby resale shop at her house right now). My family, well, they are coming along, slowly. I know if we get preggo again with in two years of having this one, I'll never hear the end of it from them, but that is their problem. Not mine. I can always hang up the phone on them if I have to.

The whole unsolicted advice on what you can and "can't" do while pregnant gets frustrating. Hubby won't let me lift much of anything (I try to not complain. He does more work around the house that way..... :lol: ). Then, I was told to not raise my hands above my head. Because that will wrap the cord around the baby's neck and kill it. Then, I keep thinking of all the stuff my great-grandma used to say about pregnancy and just have to laugh. She believed that you can't take a shower or bath while pregnant, because the water hitting your stomach would cause brain damage. That, if you looked at a disabled person, your baby would have that disability. Stuff like that.

Oh, my, I've probably wrapped my baby's cord around it's neck a few times now. LOL. Oh and I love to put the lifting on my hubby too. Except for occasionally he has back problems, so then we try to share lifting. No showers or baths? Women who have babies close together are in for a lot of smelly 9 month time frames. That kills me. And she really believed that stuff? :) :) ROFL.

I'm sorry that your family is so unsupportive of you. Sounds like your hubby's family is great though.

[Beck]

Oh man, I'm sorry that you're not getting support from your family, Crissyana. That can be so hard. You've got us, though!!! :wink:

The wives tales are too funny, though. If you LOOK at someone with a disability, your child will be born that way? Oh boy...I'm in for a shocker, then! (Not that I look at them rudely or anything! I just know a girl who is mentally challenged and have talked to her a few times - and looked at her while I talked. :shock:)

[BlessedMommy]

All the things that we wish that we could say but can't

Warning: Don't try these replies. These are for laughs only.

1) Next time someone berates you for getting pregnant because of your finances, just smile and say, "Well, if you're SO concerned about our finances we do accept donations and you're more than welcome to get a second job to help us out."

2) Next time someone asks, "So when are you going to stop having kids?" Smile and say, "When you stop bugging me about it."

[Crissyanna]

Oh, please, oh please can use those come backs? It could be fun to see the shock on a few people's faces! I can imagine it now......priceless.

My great-grandma was a weird one, I admit that. She would rub bengay on her face to relieve nasal congestion and headaches. She loved the smell of manure (and I have heard she would rub her feet in it, but I don't really want to know....). I look just like her. Well, like she did. I have a pic of when she was three (way back in like 1902) and looking at my pic at three, we could have passed as twins. And what is really scary, is I was born on her 60th wedding anniversary (her husband died about 15 years before I was born). She was odd. I hated going to her house. She had a horse hair sofa and we were expected to sit on it like little ladies. Even in shorts. Then, the last few years of her life, she would run the heater in the summer. It was always HOT in her house. And she would insist on cooking the family lunch one time during our visit (all my parents' families live within basically five miles from each other, so our vacations, we would always go to PA to visit them all) and her food was always, well, gross. I couldn't understand why the woman would serve her salad with the dressing already mixed in it. And it was always thousand island, which I have never liked. And of course, we were forced to eat it. Great-grandma was odd. But then, when you are ninety, I guess you really don't care about that anymore.

My family, well, they are interesting. I think my mom is going to end up competing with Hubby's mom to see who is the best Grandma (she did this for our wedding. My MIL made my dress, the roses for my cake and lent me her veil. My mother got jealous and bought me the silver tussy mussy holder I had wanted at a local antique shop to carry my flowers in, but wasn't going to spend the 40 bucks on myself. Then, they got into it, sort of at the rehearsal. My MIL has severe fibromyalgia and my mom had to comment that she was amazed that MIL had flown out for the wedding and was dealing with all the pain she was in [it was a TON that weekend] and was still attending the wedding. MIL's reply was that this was her son, and no way was she going to miss this for anything, short of death.). I told my mom on the phone earlier what all MIL had already bought for Dainyah, and my mom said she needed to start shopping. As much as I don't want this to turn into a competition, this is kind of amusing. I don't think we are going to have to buy much of anything ourselves for her.

I appreciate having this site for support. You have no idea what it has meant to me to have this.

Well, I have a few million things to be doing.

Crystal

Well most of the comments made to me were from my mother and FIL.

1. When I told my mum that I was pregnant with Abby her reply was "what are you going to do?" and I said "well, I'm not going to have an abortion if that's what you mean!" Then she said "congratulations" ... um, you could have said that first! Then she told me that she would have preferred it if we waited another year.

2. My dad put an announcement in our Church bulletin about my pregnancy and one of the ladies said "they could have given you some time to get used to the idea". Little did she know that it was planned. But I didn't say anything.

3. This time around my FIL said "you can't afford another one". I just said "whatever". I was so mad though.

Now whenever I say how we'd like to have another in about 6 years I get told by my parents not to have any more. It makes me so mad ... it's our choice and no one elses business how many kids we want.

Don't get me started on the comment on a message board that I read recently saying that it's irresponsible to have kids if you can't afford them all on your own and you need to get help from the government (welfare or assistance). :evil:

[BlessedMommy]

Renee, that's crazy. Seems like no matter what timing you have kids in, it's never quite good enough. If you had waited the year, your mother probably would have wanted you to wait another year.

I'm sorry that you got backlash on your second girl too. I think that we just live in an anti-child society. Is your family churchgoers or are you the first one in the family to be Christian?

We can all be thankful that our mothers were pro-life. :) If our mothers had abortions then we wouldn't be here today. It makes me angry again each time I hear a testimony where someone suggested an abortion to someone else. That's so anti-life.

One time I was over at someone else's house and they said, "If you took our son home for a while you'd change your mind about having this baby." (I was probably at least 4 months pregnant at the time) I said, "What are my alternatives to having the baby?" Silence. I mean, what are people trying to insinuate? My neighbor who is very much excited about our baby and pregnancy said, "Just say to the next person who criticizes your pregnancy, "Okay, I'll be sure to send the baby back!"

:) :) LOL.

Yeah it's pretty crazy what some people have the nerve to say/ask.
My parents and both sets of grandparents and great grandmothers are all Christian. On my dads side of the family neither of his sisters are... he is the only sibling that is saved. On my mums side of the family all her siblings and her are Christians except one (that's 4 out of 5).
I'd say about 75 percent of my whole family are Christian... that's got to be good!

I don't think my mother was suggesting I have an abortion when she asked that (or thinking it) but I don't know... it's just the way she worded it it sounded like that. And my sister (not saved) had had an abortion only 1 1/2 years before I got pregnant so I think my mother thought that I didn't want to be pregnant and that I'd do the same. Boy was she wrong!
My dads mother offered to pay for my mother to have an abortion when she got pregnant with me. But she said no thanks.

Oh dear, EVERYONE in Australia is entitled to family assistance, albeit a small amount if they are wealthy, my brother is on 100,00 p/annum and he STILL gets family assistance. All it is really are tax breaks for families, it;s not actually like taking money out of the Government coffers.

The reason why Governments give out family assistance is to keep the birthrates up as they need MORE tax payers in the future.

IN Australia I KID YOU NOT, they PAY women to have babies! I am getting 4000 when my baby is born, I don't have to apply for it, but I would be pretty STUPID not to get 4000 for all my hard work in making the thing, carrying it and birthing it. Apparently next year women having babies get paid 6000.00, so I am thinking of getting pregnant again in February next year and just living off these government grants LOL I AM KIDDING !!!

When my twins were born I got about 1500 which was pretty scummy (I am kidding) which we used to catch up on bills because my DH spent so much time with me going in and out of labour wards, bed rest etc he ran out of sick and holiday pay so therefore we ran out of cash.

One of my friends at work told me "If you wait until you have EVERYTHING before you have kids, you will NEVER have them because there will always be something else..."

you know you make the decision to have kids, and you manage like most of the people on the planet do! These people making financial comments won;t be complaining when they are old and our children are paying the taxes which pay for their pensions now will they?

as for Old Wives Tales LOL.. what about the old theory of confinement? That is hilerious! Laying on ones back through the whole last stages of pregnancy would be torture. Or the theory of "not exciting ones self" or being in a "delicate" condition.

An obstetrician told me a FUNNY wives tale he read on the internet saying if you get some drano and pee in it and it turns blue it tells you what sex the baby is LOL LOL.

My MIL believes in confinement it is so clear by the comments she has made in the past.

If it was true I wasn't meant to excite myself, well, someone come take my other two children off my hands then by all means LOL LOL.

We just had a horror time in the supermarket, naughty brats LOL.

[harmony5]

I know I've already commented but this subject seriously irks me!! We are ttc #4 and just yesterday, my dh's niece said "I think you are crazy for having another child because they are just too expensive." Well, I saw that someone else said exactly what I was thinking!!! Babies can be expensive, yes, if you choose to buy every single thing you see and you have to buy it brand new. If you do that, you will go broke. This is the case with my dh's niece. She has 2 boys and their house looks like Babies R Us merged with Toys R Us!! Now, don't get me wrong, if you have the funds to do that, by all means, do whatever you want, but she doesn't. She has to borrow money to pay bills, but you can guarantee her children having matching outfits, a yardful of outdoor toys, a houseful of electronic toys, every movie imaginable, etc, etc, etc.... I told her, "Yes, if you continuously buy things just to say your children aren't going to go without, then they are expensive." That just really hit a nerve with me. My dc are 11, 9, and 17 months. I'm not wealthy by no means, but my bills are paid and my family is not hungry. My children do not get everything they see and I do not buy them stuff just because the kid next door has it. I bet you, in the 17 months ds has been on this earth, I have not spent $100 on clothes, shoes, blankets, sheets, and stuff like that. I am all about a thrift store. Do you think when he is 25 he will look back and think his life is ruined because his mom bought him 25 cent clothes. Ummm...doubt it!! Also, for his first birthday, I made a cake, bought decorations from the Dollar Tree and bought him a gift from Big Lots. I only invited family too. All together, I spent less than $40.00. When my nieces baby turned 2, OMG, you should have seen the shindig!!! There were about 40 people there that included family, friends and neighbors. The only children there were hers and mine!! But the whole house was decorated in Elmo stuff...even a pinata..2 days before Christmas!! We couldn't even break the thing because it was freeeezzzing outside. But, yeah, she had all the bells and whistles. She also ordered pizza for everyone!! And she ended up spending over $400.00. :shock: Yeah, no wonder she thinks they are expensive. Plus, just a little sidenote here, I was extremely pleased with my ds's party. We all had a great time. I actually felt a little embarrassed for her during her sons because he did not care anything about what was going on (because he's 2) and her FIL and dh as well as a couple others broke out the case of beer!! At a 2 year old's party!!! :roll: :roll:

Oh my, I have gotten way off course here! [sorry] :lol: :oops: It just makes me so angry when someone comments on anyone's children or pregnancy. [whatfurious] I raise my children without asking anyone for anything. If I knew I couldn't feed a child or clothe a child, then I do think I am smart enough to avoid getting pregnant. I just wish people would give pregnant women a little credit.

Okay, I'll hush now. [soapbox]

I sure do love you guys. I know I ramble on sometimes, but it sure does feel good to get stuff off my chest and talk to people who actually know where I'm coming from!

Lori

[BlessedMommy]

AussieMum, your government PAYS you to have kids? You're so lucky! Actually we'll sort of get paid too, since we'll get a lot more back on our tax return next year.

Renee, I actually don't think that that person was suggesting abortion to me either. It's just that sometimes people say stupid things without thinking through how they sound first.

Lori, ITA about getting cheap things. Let other people pay full price if they want to. We can get their barely used items at thrift stores and garage sales. My DH have bought very little in the way of baby things, our child is the first grandchild for both sides of the family so we've got flooded with baby things. We're going to have to store some of the clothing in larger sizes away until the baby can fit them! I can sympathize with you about people attacking your decision to have a larger than average family. It seems like a lot of people have bought into the "two is enough" thing to the point where they feel free to criticize others for having more. Now, it's fine if my neighbor down the street wants to have 2 kids. However, it's my DH's and I's personal business if we want to have 3, 4, 5 or more, as long as we feed and clothe them.

Oh dear, EVERYONE in Australia is entitled to family assistance, albeit a small amount if they are wealthy, my brother is on 100,00 p/annum and he STILL gets family assistance. All it is really are tax breaks for families, it;s not actually like taking money out of the Government coffers.

The reason why Governments give out family assistance is to keep the birthrates up as they need MORE tax payers in the future.

IN Australia I KID YOU NOT, they PAY women to have babies! I am getting 4000 when my baby is born, I don't have to apply for it, but I would be pretty STUPID not to get 4000 for all my hard work in making the thing, carrying it and birthing it. Apparently next year women having babies get paid 6000.00, so I am thinking of getting pregnant again in February next year and just living off these government grants LOL I AM KIDDING !!!

When my twins were born I got about 1500 which was pretty scummy (I am kidding) which we used to catch up on bills because my DH spent so much time with me going in and out of labour wards, bed rest etc he ran out of sick and holiday pay so therefore we ran out of cash.

One of my friends at work told me "If you wait until you have EVERYTHING before you have kids, you will NEVER have them because there will always be something else..."

you know you make the decision to have kids, and you manage like most of the people on the planet do! These people making financial comments won;t be complaining when they are old and our children are paying the taxes which pay for their pensions now will they?
as for Old Wives Tales LOL.. what about the old theory of confinement? That is hilerious! Laying on ones back through the whole last stages of pregnancy would be torture. Or the theory of "not exciting ones self" or being in a "delicate" condition.

An obstetrician told me a FUNNY wives tale he read on the internet saying if you get some drano and pee in it and it turns blue it tells you what sex the baby is LOL LOL.

My MIL believes in confinement it is so clear by the comments she has made in the past.

If it was true I wasn't meant to excite myself, well, someone come take my other two children off my hands then by all means LOL LOL.

We just had a horror time in the supermarket, naughty brats LOL.

Aussiemum ITA with you! Everyone pays taxes (including my husband) and it benefits everyone! I hate it when people have the nerve to say that women who SAH and raise their kids knowing they need help from the government are just lazy bludgers. Well I'm sorry they feel that way but they are also benefitting from paying taxes. And assistance really isn't that great. I'd have more money if I worked than I do being a SAHM. I chose to do this because I want to see my child grow up and I want to raise them full-time until they go to school. That was my choice and no one elses business.
And if we waited until we were financially able to pay for EVERYTHING on our own then we would never have kids either. Even those on two incomes sometimes find they need extra help. What if their husband lost his job or they lost their job? Would they go without essential things because they didn't want to accept help from anyone? Would they starve their child? I don't think so.

We also get money when we have a child. It's $1200. I think it's supposed to be to help you get stuff you need eg stroller etc... We have to get a double stroller and eventually we'll have to get a booster seat for Abby. So that's at least $550 gone. I also want to get an electric breast pump and a sling and a boppy pillow because I'm breastfeeding this time. And I'll probably have to buy a few other odds and ends like more bibs etc... The rest will go on paying off bills.

[Robynn]

Isn't it amazing the things people will say in regards to your sexual and reproductive life? I have been through all of it, too. I always get a kick out of hearing just how goofy some people can be.

With my last, I was so tired and sick, I could barely get 20 steps and I would be out of breath and doubled over in pain. Once a lady asked me if I had been out partying too hard the nite before. Yah, lady, I do alot of that being pregnant and having morning sickness! :roll:

And the people that think that just becoz your stomach gets to the party 7 minutes before you, that it's public property. I said "Better not let my husband see you groping his pregnant wife like that", and they would just laugh. I mean one lady was grabbing me when I told her I was 8 weeks. What are you doing???

I think pregnant women must give off pheromes that are potent enought o make anyone within arms reach completely daft. 8)

[BlessedMommy]

Oh, here's another one:

My church went to pass out literature door to door. One very sweet young lady in our church dashed up and hugged me and said, "Oh my, you shouldn't be out here walking!" I just smiled and said, "My midwife told me to walk a lot."

Another time, I ran down the stairs to our church basement and a church lady said, "You shouldn't be running in your condition." I said, "What condition? I feel just fine." LOL.

[Crissyanna]

Oh, those whole "condition" comments. Drives me batty. Whenever I get one of those, I ask the person, Since when is pregnancy a disease? I thought it was a natural life process. That gets most people to quit talking. At least for me.

Crystal

[MomFromCanada]

One of the comments I got once was from another man in our Church, he said, "You Look as Big as a House!" And he thought he was trying to be funny. Whatever.

[mamallama]

Dh then said to me, with tears in his eyes "If on our 20th anniversary, you can look me in the eyes, and tell me that you have loved me, every day, of every one of those 20 years, then my life will have been a success." :D

You're DH sounds like a really great guy. :D

[mamallama]

There is this lady that I've known for several years (but haven't seen that often) that saw me in Wal-Mart after I got pregnant with my second child. She looked at my stomach and then at my face (don't you hate when they do that?) and said, "Oh! Are you pregnant?" I smiled and said, "Yes, as a matter of fact I am." I just know from past experiences that she was trying to say I looked fat - in not so many words. I honestly don't think she expected me to say I actually was pregnant. :roll:

Then just a week or so again, I was in Wal-Mart (love that place) with my first child and saw her again. I smiled and said "hello!". She looked at my daughter and said, "When are you going to have another one of those?" I said, "I already have. I have a little 9 month old boy at home with his Nana." But what I reeeeeally wanted to say was, "How quickly we forget, eh? You commented on my pregnant tummy about year ago!"

Sheesh. And she goes to church too! :shock:

[ashtonsmama]

We actually got the other end of the spectrum: the "oh, when are you going to start trying for a baby" or "don't you want children" questions...those were just as bad, because we actually both tried to hold off on trying for a baby (even though we both wanted to) because we knew the timing really wasn't right, especially financially and spiritually as well. Now was the perfect timing, and this second baby certainly wasn't planned, at all, but I've been getting dumb comments already about them being so close in age and everything...it should be interesting, eh?

:lol:

The biggest challenge with my pregnancy besides the pregnancy itself, was hearing my church gossip that we'd lost the first one...We moved our wedding up 9 months because we were in love and didn't want to wait any longer but everyone assumed it was because I was pregnant - impossible I assure you..What made this so hurtful, was that I had lost the first one, but not when they thought I had, I lost one 4mo into our marriage and I was just 5wks along. I never was able to open up with anyone in that church to help me deal with the loss of my first one or deal with a highrisk pregnancy....So yeah, people can be stupid and hurtful..We really need to watch what we say..

I also had one woman, a stranger at the store, tisk,tisk,tisk at me and say " so many kids having kids today " ..I was 18 :shock: My friends had their babies between 13 and 17...I thought I'd done well :lol:

[BlessedMommy]

We actually got the other end of the spectrum: the "oh, when are you going to start trying for a baby" or "don't you want children" questions...those were just as bad, because we actually both tried to hold off on trying for a baby (even though we both wanted to) because we knew the timing really wasn't right, especially financially and spiritually as well. Now was the perfect timing, and this second baby certainly wasn't planned, at all, but I've been getting dumb comments already about them being so close in age and everything...it should be interesting, eh?

:lol:

I'm sorry, Amanda. People can be such a pain, can't they? It's about time for people to realize that every baby is a gift from God.

I'm so thankful for unplanned pregnancies! My mother was approximately 11 1/2 months younger than her older sister. I doubt that my grandmother planned them that close, but I'm sure thankful that my mom was born or I wouldn't be here!

I really have to wonder when attitudes with regards to having babies and when etc comes from Christian circles! Like a given in the world there are certain attitudes which are prevailant, but I really begin to worry at the state of peoples hearts particularly when I hear what Angelsmom said!!!

DH and I only had one person accuse us of getting married because I was pregnant and he was obviously a flunk at maths LOL.

We got engaged after 3 months of meeting and dating - we met at Bible College, THEN - married 6 months or so after the engagement and this person still tried to tell us I was pregnant that's why we got married (???), when I got pregnant by choice 6 months after we were married (mmm I have NEVER known a baby to gestate for 15 months LOL).

The whole time at Bible college there was a group of people gossiping and saying we were having pre-marital sex and calling us Lascivious and trying to get us to break up, so we left since we felt we could not approch the dean with our problem. We were both virgins until our wedding night - and personally I think it was an attack of jealousy and gossip!

So in condradiction to the word of God about "Children being an inheritance and a blessing from God".

[BlessedMommy]

I'm so sorry, Lis and Emma. People need to stop judging other people. I know of a lady who got pregnant 9 months after she got married. That would put her having the baby 1 1/2 years after she was married. And people STILL tried to say that she got pregnant before she was married. I mean, c'mon, how many babies gestate for 18 months?

I would love to go into labor at 38 weeks and get this baby out so this rash will clear up, but I worry about what people would say if our baby comes 8 1/2 months after we got married instead of 9! Hopefully, if I do deliver a couple of weeks early, intelligent people will realize that normal gestation ranges anywhere from 3 weeks early to 2 weeks late and won't try to secondguess our integrity!

[Madre]

After we had our third, my mil said, "Eenie, meenie, miney, no mo." Actually, I thought this was pretty funny! :lol:

The biggest challenge with my pregnancy besides the pregnancy itself, was hearing my church gossip that we'd lost the first one...We moved our wedding up 9 months because we were in love and didn't want to wait any longer but everyone assumed it was because I was pregnant - impossible I assure you..What made this so hurtful, was that I had lost the first one, but not when they thought I had, I lost one 4mo into our marriage and I was just 5wks along. I never was able to open up with anyone in that church to help me deal with the loss of my first one or deal with a highrisk pregnancy....So yeah, people can be stupid and hurtful..We really need to watch what we say..

I also had one woman, a stranger at the store, tisk,tisk,tisk at me and say " so many kids having kids today " ..I was 18 :shock: My friends had their babies between 13 and 17...I thought I'd done well :lol:

My mum had me at 19. Nothing wrong with 18!
In those days it was normal to have your first child at 18. Nowadays you are a young mother if you have your first before 30. Ok whatever........ :?

We actually got the other end of the spectrum: the "oh, when are you going to start trying for a baby" or "don't you want children" questions...those were just as bad, because we actually both tried to hold off on trying for a baby (even though we both wanted to) because we knew the timing really wasn't right, especially financially and spiritually as well. Now was the perfect timing, and this second baby certainly wasn't planned, at all, but I've been getting dumb comments already about them being so close in age and everything...it should be interesting, eh?

:lol:

I'm sorry, Amanda. People can be such a pain, can't they? It's about time for people to realize that every baby is a gift from God.

I'm so thankful for unplanned pregnancies! My mother was approximately 11 1/2 months younger than her older sister. I doubt that my grandmother planned them that close, but I'm sure thankful that my mom was born or I wouldn't be here!

So true! I know a guy who's younger brother is EXACTLY 9 months younger. That is scary but it's no one elses business. I just have to wonder if he came early or if she got pregnant the same day she delivered his brother... that is really freaky :lol:

You know people think it is weird that we are having another baby because we have a boy and a girl LOL.

As for people setting themselves up as judges over everyone else and saying false slander, the NT is quite clear on the issues so perhaps they should spend more time LEARNING the word than making judgements on other believers. :oops: [readthebible]

Why would anyone besmirch someone elses reputation with in the church, except to "big note" themselves in front of others by dragging someone else through the mud.

I would never even slander someone who had a baby out of wedlock with in the church (my sister did), the actual act of sex out of marriage is wrong in God's eyes but it certainly will not help the mother or child by smudging them for life, or treating the innocent child badly.

When my sister got pregnant out of marriage at 25, wow people just seemed to delight in the thought of a "fallen" woman - it took me a very long time to come to terms with the anger over that. She did stuff in the past but she is now full on walking with the Lord, so if I even think there is a whisper about her on the issue, I won't even deal with the people involved. Like Jesus said "take the plank out of your own eye".

[soapbox]

xox Aussie Mum

[BlessedMommy]

You know people think it is weird that we are having another baby because we have a boy and a girl LOL.

As for people setting themselves up as judges over everyone else and saying false slander, the NT is quite clear on the issues so perhaps they should spend more time LEARNING the word than making judgements on other believers. :oops: [readthebible]

Why would anyone besmirch someone elses reputation with in the church, except to "big note" themselves in front of others by dragging someone else through the mud.

I would never even slander someone who had a baby out of wedlock with in the church (my sister did), the actual act of sex out of marriage is wrong in God's eyes but it certainly will not help the mother or child by smudging them for life, or treating the innocent child badly.

When my sister got pregnant out of marriage at 25, wow people just seemed to delight in the thought of a "fallen" woman - it took me a very long time to come to terms with the anger over that. She did stuff in the past but she is now full on walking with the Lord, so if I even think there is a whisper about her on the issue, I won't even deal with the people involved. Like Jesus said "take the plank out of your own eye".

[soapbox]

xox Aussie Mum

That's funny that in our society you are "allowed" to have a third if your first two children are the same gender, but not "allowed" to if you already have a boy and a girl. I think that it's crazy that people have invented that standard.

You're so right that judging other people won't help them to be better people or help their children. The church should spend more time helping them than slandering them and gossiping about them.

Renee, it's possible that that lady could have gotten pregnant about two weeks after she delivered the baby and then had that baby at 38 weeks gestation. Or 4 weeks/36 weeks, etc. I would think that it would be fairly rare to conceive on the day you gave birth even biologically speaking, not to mention the fact that few women feel up to making love that day and you can't even get the doctor's go ahead until you stop bleeding!

Ruth I would be even suprised the woman would have felt like making love even the week after LOL.

The baby can easily be 5 weeks early???

We had guys at our school who were barely a year apart and in the same grade because one got kept down, it was soooo odd to have brothers who weren't twins in the same year, but they were great friends of mine so I soon got over trying to work out the math LOL.

You know people think it is weird that we are having another baby because we have a boy and a girl LOL.

Well it is no one elses business but yours... just remember that! :wink:

I would never even slander someone who had a baby out of wedlock with in the church (my sister did), the actual act of sex out of marriage is wrong in God's eyes but it certainly will not help the mother or child by smudging them for life, or treating the innocent child badly.

Neither would I. My mother conceived me out of wedlock. They got married in June which was 4 months before I was born.
And I conceived Abby out of wedlock.

xox Aussie Mum

Renee, it's possible that that lady could have gotten pregnant about two weeks after she delivered the baby and then had that baby at 38 weeks gestation. Or 4 weeks/36 weeks, etc. I would think that it would be fairly rare to conceive on the day you gave birth even biologically speaking, not to mention the fact that few women feel up to making love that day and you can't even get the doctor's go ahead until you stop bleeding!

Yeah I know. But she COULD have gotten pregnant the same day...
I have heard that in Samoan culture (I think it was Samoan... could be Tongan) it is tradition/custom for a woman who has just delivered her baby to have intercourse with her husband straight away (as soon as she has finished delivering baby) (EWWW!) and get pregnant again. I don't think I could do that. Paul wouldn't even come near me :lol:

Sorry if that's way too much information...
Rachel you can delete this post if you want. LOL :oops:

isn't wedlock a funny word? Say it out loud 10 x it's funny.

I know! It reminds me of the word "Warlock". Where on earth did it come from? LOL

It's so old fashioned!!! I call myself MWK (married with kids).

Renee if I was a tongan or samoan I would jump in my canoe and row away as fast as I could. ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Can you imagine the high rate of infection???

there is actually a scripture in the Bible which says not to have sex during times like that. (Do not lie with a menstruous woman) - there are some things a woman should keep private even when married. But I guess a lot of cultures are completely different...

Oh I forgot to say, re the stupid comments made to pregnant woman, everytime I see my Dad he says "Hi Fatty" and I CAN'T STAND IT (its in relation to my pregnancy) LOL.

It's so old fashioned!!! I call myself MWK (married with kids).

Renee if I was a tongan or samoan I would jump in my canoe and row away as fast as I could. ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Can you imagine the high rate of infection???

there is actually a scripture in the Bible which says not to have sex during times like that. (Do not lie with a menstruous woman) - there are some things a woman should keep private even when married. But I guess a lot of cultures are completely different...

:lol: and exactly! I just couldn't do that.

Oh I forgot to say, re the stupid comments made to pregnant woman, everytime I see my Dad he says "Hi Fatty" and I CAN'T STAND IT (its in relation to my pregnancy) LOL.

Oh AussieMum I know! My sister said exactly the same thing to me at my great grandmas funeral. I didn't know how to react. Considering it was at a funeral I just smiled and laughed. And I'm sure she was just joking around (she patted my tummy while she said it). But it did kinda offend me/annoy me. But then most things do right now HAHAHA These pregnancy hormones are so horrible!