My 7 yr. old will do some odd things that ends up drawing people's attention to him and he seems to do this on purpose. It is embarassing to us and we don't know how to get him to stop. He seems to think attention should be on him for some reason. Most kids have learned to just ignore him now and find him "annoying". Has anyone ever had to deal with this?

Example - yesterday the couple that do the Jr. Church were away and had asked my dh to fill in for them. During the class, our son starts laughing and says "hey everyone laugh at my dad"! I was NOT happy about that but since my dh and I were the only adults in there (less than 10 kids) I didn't feel like I could take him out and leave dh in there with the kids.

I just don't know what to do when he acts like this.

Janell

I don't know what to tell you other than I know from my experience substitute teaching (and you know how kids try subs!) that when a child acts out and alot of attention is given him for doing so, then it just fuels his or her desire to continue doing so. Today I subed in a kindergarten class that I have to say is the worse class I have ever subed in! ADHD was rampant in that class! Anyway there was a little boy in there named Chance that tried and tried my patience as well as the parapro's patience. He would not listen to us and was so defiant about everything. The only things that partially worked with him was ignoring him, that is until he exhibited behavior that could not be ignored like pulling a chair out from under a little girl, and standing him out in the hall--he really hated that because he could look in at the kids and they were having fun. But honestly that child had the worse behavior I have ever seen and if I had to deal with him everyday then I would probably quit my job [crwy] . I know your son isn't that bad so maybe ignoring him and taking privledges away from him would solve his problem. Good luck, Stephanie

Have you tried explaining to him how it affects other people? That others don't actually find it funny, and if anything, just get annoyed by it? Sometimes, when my eldest is feeling out of his depth, or whatever, he goes out of his way, trying to be funny, to get other kids to like him :roll: Thankfully, though, he settles pretty quickly when I speak to him, and he doesn't do it very often. I just explain that others don't think it's funny, and will just get annoyed and not want to play with him. I reinforce that I know he's just trying to make them laugh and have fun, but you also have to know when to stop.

As for the way he was acting in Kid's Church, a lot of kids will act up a bit when it's their parents helping. I was on Sunday School with my boys this week, and they were a bit demanding of my attention. I just quietly explained to them that if they want me there helping (and they do), that they have to behave nicely, and understand I'm there to help all the children, not just them, and that we will have some nice time to ourselves when we get home.

Hopefully you will be able to reach him so that he understands how this behaviour affects others, and that if he settles down a bit, other children will be more inclined to play with him.

Janell that is exactly what my almost 7 yo does. She is normally quiet and shy but when she wants my full attention she pulls out all the stops. For example.... Tuesdays I meet with two other women from church, did so before I was homeschooling for about 2 years. Now that they are home all the time with me we're finding we have to be creative about how we deal with the kids when we need the adult time. Sophie who is normally very shy around other people, started dancing and bouncing around when I was talking with the other ladies and she wanted to watch a movie, she got to watch the movie she wanted even tho her sibs wanted to watch something else and she still wanted to stay with us and have our full attention. I was already at the end of my rope and so my friend stepped in and asked if she wanted to colour. She did and she stopped acting really silly. I dont always know how to deal with it myself. Its just Sophie as well who acts like that. She'll do it at church when there are loads of people around. I dont know what to do myself. Its not that bad really, I just give her some attention and a hug and she runs off sometimes, other times she needs more attention than that. She is also very self concious and very dramatic. She will start sobbing at the simplest things and at first I thought there was something emotionally wrong with her, not clinical or anything but..... well I realized that she is basically, to put it simply, a drama queen. She reacts without thinking. She'll stomp about, shout, get really angry. I dont know.


Im glad you brought this up because I have been wanting to for Sophie for so long and I just didnt know how to put it. Is your son similar in the ways that I described Sophie? She is not a behaviourly challenged kid. She doesnt have adhd or anything like that but man she has always tried my patience more than any of the others!

Hi, Gen! [welcomehi] I don't mean to interrupt... :? I'm no expert, but it sounds like Sophie is a bit jealous of your attention (and who could blame her :) ) and is looking to be assured that she's still the apple of your eye even while your attention is elsewhere.

Joy [welcomewave]

Remember kids are pretty smart (at least mine are). They know when we are unable to discipline them properly. ie shopping, friends house, church. What I try to do if I am able is to take them aside and speak to them about their behavior. Also a trick my mom used to do when she taught was if someone was playing or wispering or even talking while she was doing the story she would stop the story or lesson and look at them and wait for them to stop and what would happen is they would be embarresed because everyone would be looking at them so they would stop (she would warn them before she started about doing this so they were aware of what would happen).

I also think it is about respect and our kids need to learn to respect those who are teaching them and ask permission to speak when in a class room or sundayschool. Just my humble opinion

Just me, taking more notes and running with them [whatrunningscared]

Some kids just try too hard. But one thing I found that if they figure out that there is NO situation that I won't stop what I am doing and take them aside and address their behavior, then they can't take advantage of me! I will stop WHATEVER I am doing. I walk over to them, remove them from the room, and I instruct them using scripture as necessary or just informing them what is inappropriate about their behavior. Patience, and perseverance in training and instruction and discipling. It will get better. But I do understand. I have an immature ADHD 10 year old who will act silly sometimes...I give him a look that he knows means, " straighten up." I have backed up my words long enough that the look alone does it now!