Oh ladies. The sitter has threatened to kick Sam out unless he changes his ways. He says that he cries all day and needs constant attention. She says he doesn't play with his toys alone.

Now, I know that Sam is "clingy" he was little when he was born and I held him a lot! I really have been working with him though and at home he can play with himself on the floor with some toys for a little while without needing me to hold him. He is a cosleeper with me though and when he gets tired i do rock him and sing to him, I don't let him fuss very much.

It breaks my heart to let him fuss. The daycare lady said though unless he can be more independent in two weeks he has to go somewhere else. I have to work to support my family. I wish I could just stay home with him.

So, starting tonight i am going to start making him sleep in his crib in the other room and try to get him to be more independent. Please pray for me as this is not going to be an easy journey :(

Also, do you ladies have any ideas to help?

ok I understand as a day care provider there is more than one child to tend to, but, seriously? 7 months and she expects him to play on his own? I think she's expecting too much. Beginning to? Sure. But to say "he's not and if it doesn't change asap goodbye" ??

*sigh*

Maybe it's time to start looking elsewhere.

ok I understand as a day care provider there is more than one child to tend to, but, seriously? 7 months and she expects him to play on his own? I think she's expecting too much. Beginning to? Sure. But to say "he's not and if it doesn't change asap goodbye" ??

*sigh*

Maybe it's time to start looking elsewhere.

Yeah, that. He's just a baby. :( I sure feel sad for you, gal. I'll be praying for you.... ::hugs::

I agree with Tara and Jen....

Exactly what T' said! I wouldn't even be for trying to change EVERYTHING right away... I know he has to be at a daycare... and no matter how good of a daycare you find it will never really substitute mommy so if Sam can't see you during the day... why take mommy away at night too??? It's just my opinion but I wouldn't change anything at home... let him be with you... as much as possible... don't you think? Maybe the ladies will advice the opposite... I don't know if putting him in a crib in another room will be the best thing... I wouldn't do it... I would actually even spend MORE TIME WITH HIM ... you know? I don't have to put my girls in a daycare or anything so I might be wrong... but I feel like YOUR PRESENCE, touch, warmth, love will even help him be more confident... knowing that when the TIME COMES everyday he'll BE WITH MOMMY! and get that security there. I think I am ranting and I don't know if what I am saying makes sense... But... I guess what I am saying is... I wouldn't change anything at home, at least not now, he is still so little! PLUS... another baby is coming... I feel like that will bring enough change and require Sam to adapt to not being just HIM AND MOMMY at home pretty soon.

I will certainly pray... for you and Sam... things like this make me so sad, I can't imagine how you feel! :cry:

Paloma.

Just wanted to say I agree with the other ladies. ((hugs))

I totally agree! 7 months is WAY too young developmentally to be independent. I would check this womans credentials because anyone who actually went to early childhood education would be able to tell you that. If she is overwhelmed with a baby, I would say you have 2 weeks to find a new daycare who will be more realistic. Is there anyone from your church, maybe a SAHM, who could use the extra money by watching your child while you are at work?

I agree w/ the others. He's awfully little still. When it's time for him to move to his own bed I would do it very gradually, let him fall asleep with you, then move him to his bed in your room, gradually working up to him sleeping in his own bed in your room, before moving him to his own room. I would check into a different baby sitter too.

It is not you or Sam. Never met an independent 7 month old.

Praying you can find someone who's spot on for you two. Someone who is gold for infants too so you can have a longterm relationship with her. [amen]. Maybe someday a job will come up w/onsite daycare...?

Hugs...

Agree with the other ladies. 7 month old babies *need* lots of attention. Being left on their own for long periods of time is not good for them. They need lots of interaction and talking, play time... .

I wonder if he is fussing bc she is expecting him to be too independent... he could be behaving very well but she can't expect to set him down and ignore him for an hour.

Ditto everyone else! He's only seven months old, it sounds like the babysitter is not being realistic.

I agree with everyone else, is she a qualified sitter as in state certified? Or is she a lady that watches children, I know here in tx an individual is allowed to watch several children but can't exceed a certain limit or they have to be state certified, if she is certified to be a caregiver then if you can I would look for another sitter because she should know better, if she isn't certified I would still leave because she doesn't know babies very well if she thinks a 7mos old should be independent, that is really crazy and would make me feel uncomfortable for her to watch my baby if she feels he should be independent I would be worried she would neglect my child, anyway prayers for you and sam and don't worry sam is a typical 7mos old and maybe start looking around for another sitter *hugs*

Wanted to come back in and ditto P's comment....I wouldn't be forcing him out of my bed at home either. Just as P said, keep him close, carry on as normal at home. There's no reason not to. THAT is where his security is coming from.

Thank you all! Yes, she is state licensed and comes highly recommended, that is why it threw me off so much.

She said that he doesn't play with his toys unless they are playing with him and he cries unless he is being held and he refuses to take a nap in the crib. She did apologize for coming across so rash, she just had a bad day, which is completely understandable.

I don't know. She said that he is cranky and naps around lunch time but since she has to hold him in order to sleep that she is unable to get lunch for the other kids.

Maybe she could hold him in a baby carrier. Then her hands would be free.

all children are different... and being a baby HE is NOT doing anything WRONG. He is being a baby... Some are clingier, some are a little more independent, Natalia was the clingier kind and Karina is the "independent" one... (she doesn't like it when I am around for her nap or bed time... she can't sleep if I hold her) but even when Karina is like that she doesn't like playing on her own for more than 5 minutes... And she is almost 11 MO. Babies need to turn around and see an approving face, a happy face and most of all a motherly face... I still suggest the very thing I mentioned in my first post... not changing anything for Sam... He is a baby, his dad isn't around everyday and he is in a daycare during the day plus there is more change coming his way with his little brother/sister... I would just HOLD HIM 'TILL MY ARMS HURT every night no matter what the "licensed sitter" says.... She should be able to handle this and the other kids better. Thanks T' for dittoing my previous comment.

Hugs for you Krystalia... I know you'll receive guidance from the Lord to do what's best... in the end none of us loves Sam more than you do... I know your decision will be based on that love... but just keep your ears open to the advice of other mommies and don't let any comments from the sitter throw you off at all.

Paloma.

Everything Paloma said in both posts! And what the others said as well.