SupermansLady
01-24-2007, 02:52 PM
My stepdaughter is 12. Her living situation is not what I would consider good (at all). My DH and her mother had a literal "one night stand", she became pregnant, had my stepdaughter and didn't tell my DH for 5 years he had a daughter. (He had moved out of state within a month of their fling and didn't move back for almost 5 years.)
So, my DH was not a part of her life for the "formative" years as my mom would say, and he was not a Christian until 7 months ago, so his influence on her has not been great either. Her mother has not worked since the day she found out she was pregnant, lives in a goverment housing project, gets food stamps, TEA assistance and of course child support from my DH and her other daughters dad. She recently had a man move in with them. She is white, he is black. My stepdaughters younger sister is mixed. (I don't know if interacial relationships are wrong in God's eyes, but were I come from, they are always more difficult on the kids involved as is this case.) This whole situation causes me concern.
My stepdaughter informed me over the weekend (we had just told her that we are expecting) that she has become sexually active with this mans son who is 15. She is not on birth control, nor did they use any protection. Her comment was something like this, "maybe we will have babies who are close in age and they can play together."
HELP!!!!! This is a child who needs a ton of prayer. We have done what we can to influence her, but her living situation condones everything she is now experimenting with. Unfortunatly, this is not something we can take to court and say, "she needs to live with us, her mom is unfit". The kids are well fed, clothed, go to school, not abused. They just aren't being brought up in a Christian home.
I think this is the absolute hardest part about coming to Christ at a later age in life and having children with multiple partners. You can't do a lot about what you did wrong before and you can only hope that God is able to get their attention before it is too late.
Anyway - back to my original reason for posting this. Has anyone else dealt with a sexually active young teenager who isn't being responsible at all about it? What should we do as dad and stepmom? Is prayer the only thing in this case that will work?
Thanks for any advice you may have to offer.
So, my DH was not a part of her life for the "formative" years as my mom would say, and he was not a Christian until 7 months ago, so his influence on her has not been great either. Her mother has not worked since the day she found out she was pregnant, lives in a goverment housing project, gets food stamps, TEA assistance and of course child support from my DH and her other daughters dad. She recently had a man move in with them. She is white, he is black. My stepdaughters younger sister is mixed. (I don't know if interacial relationships are wrong in God's eyes, but were I come from, they are always more difficult on the kids involved as is this case.) This whole situation causes me concern.
My stepdaughter informed me over the weekend (we had just told her that we are expecting) that she has become sexually active with this mans son who is 15. She is not on birth control, nor did they use any protection. Her comment was something like this, "maybe we will have babies who are close in age and they can play together."
HELP!!!!! This is a child who needs a ton of prayer. We have done what we can to influence her, but her living situation condones everything she is now experimenting with. Unfortunatly, this is not something we can take to court and say, "she needs to live with us, her mom is unfit". The kids are well fed, clothed, go to school, not abused. They just aren't being brought up in a Christian home.
I think this is the absolute hardest part about coming to Christ at a later age in life and having children with multiple partners. You can't do a lot about what you did wrong before and you can only hope that God is able to get their attention before it is too late.
Anyway - back to my original reason for posting this. Has anyone else dealt with a sexually active young teenager who isn't being responsible at all about it? What should we do as dad and stepmom? Is prayer the only thing in this case that will work?
Thanks for any advice you may have to offer.