OKAY. I am seriously thinking of packing it up and moving far far away... (Okay, not really, but if I'm overly dramatic HERE, with you guys, then maybe I can keep my cool with my hooligans!)

Let's make this one about Ephraim, shall we? He's six and a half. He is a very very capable little guy, generally loves to help, usually happy, although he can throw a ferocious tantrum....

ANYWAY, the current issue is with morning chores. They have a chart in each of their rooms that says EXACTLY what they need to do in the morning, pray, make bed, tidy room, get dressed... it's been this way for... um, forever...

Ephraim takes FOREVER, to do a job that should take 20 minutes. Seriously, he fusses around, he plays, he dawdles... He is capable of doing the chores that quickly, because he SOMETIMES does it.

Here's what we've tried, we've tried having him earn something that he really wants by saying that if he does the morning chores in the allotted time (I usually set the timer so I don't forget), if he does that for 7 days in a row, then he can earn his own watch. If he doesn't, then no watch. Yah, so that didn't work... the timer would go, and he's STILL in his pjs.

So then it was losing a privilege... like Awana, or taking all the toys out of his room... or losing his cd player if it isn't finished in the allotted time.

Yah, that doesn't work either.

So, our mornings end up being me threatening, setting the timer, yelling (sigh), and basically getting INSANELY frustrated.

He knows EXACTLY what's expected of him. He has a spot for the toys in his room (just lego and tinker toys). He has labeled shelves for his clothes... he KNOWS what is expected of him, because if he's asked what he's supposed to do, then he can tell you.

But, if we go and check on him, and he's done nothing, then he says, "oh, i forgot." ARRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!

Okay, so that novel to say, HELP PLEASE!! Any other ideas that we haven't tried??? Hanging him by his toes from the garage rafters??? Selling him to wandering passersby? SOMETHING??!?!?!

First of all.. I KNOW how you feel! I have a 6-1/2 yr old who is the same way! Drives me crazy!


Here's what we've tried, we've tried having him earn something that he really wants by saying that if he does the morning chores in the allotted time (I usually set the timer so I don't forget), if he does that for 7 days in a row, then he can earn his own watch. If he doesn't, then no watch. Yah, so that didn't work... the timer would go, and he's STILL in his pjs.

This may sound silly but it has worked for me in the past to use the timer but when the timer goes off I don't allow her to finish the job. It might not work for your guy.. he may just feel like he's getting out of his chores.:???: You still have to stick to the loss of priveledge so he's not getting off scott free of course. My girl really dislikes being "cut off" like that though so it has worked for us. And maybe after making him go to the grocery store in his pj's a few times he'll be motivated enough to get dressed in a timely manner each morning. :mrgreen:


Okay, so that novel to say, HELP PLEASE!! Any other ideas that we haven't tried??? Hanging him by his toes from the garage rafters???

My brother's actually did this to me for "ratting them out" when I was 10. I wouldn't recommend it.. it might freak you out when his face turns purple and he passes out from too much blood rushing to the brain. LOL

The timer thing works for Timmy most the time, because he's competitive. So i'll "race" him to complete chores, because he hates "losing" (and then as long as he's working the whole time and doing his best I make sure he "wins")lol. If your sons competitive have him race his siblings. If not... that probably won't work. Usually if racing doesn't work (which is rare) I would just say something like no breakfast/lunch/dinner/going places until the job is done. Then he'll kinda freak out, even if he wasn't hungry at the time he'll be like, "oh no, but I'm so hungry/thirsty!" ROFL And I'll say "then you had better finish your chores!"

My brother's actually did this to me for "ratting them out" when I was 10. I wouldn't recommend it.. it might freak you out when his face turns purple and he passes out from too much blood rushing to the brain. LOL

HAHAHAHAAAAHAAA! Oh my goodness, Ashlee, I laughed so hard when I read this!

Thanks for the advice, ladies... sadly, Eph likes competition, but is a very poor poor loser... I think i may have posted something about that in here at one time. We've also tried the no breakfast til your chores are done bit, and that doesn't phase him either.

Interesting about not finishing the job... I think he'd just be happy to get out of it tho. SIGH.

I'm starting to think military school may be the only option. ;)

Sometimes, our best option has proven to be some type of negative consequence when DS is not doing what he knows he is supposed to be doing. Sometimes, he would just as well not do than to do, so some of the things you've mentioned naturally would not work for this type of situation. Time outs have worked well for us and we also use spanking as necessary, but we try to limit these to defiant types of behavior or as a last resort option when nothing else is working and we feel like we need to reinforce the importance of obeying.

With chores at our house, sometimes he gets money for them (LOVE Dave Ramsey's use of the word commission for this, rather than allowance, BTW), other times, it is *just* to help out. Usually, if it's a time where he can earn money, knowing he will not get it if he doesn't do it motivates him. But as of yet, we do not have a "regular" type routine for them like you have described. We used to be better about that and he was an age where getting a sticker when finishing was good enough for him. But I know that only lasts to a certain age. Right now, like I said, we don't have a specific set time where it's expected daily, more of just when I ask him to do it. And for that type of situation, if I ask him to help and he doesn't want to, I don't really push him to do it. But at his age also, he is generally wanting to help and sometimes when I do the things that I allow him to help out with at other times, he will come and insist that he do it! [rotfl]