By Jodie Lynn
We just found out that my husband will be getting a promotion that requires us to move to another state. My children are quite upset. Plus, it's in a very cold area that is known for frigid weather during the winter. How can I make this a positive change?
ANSWER FROM READER:
Unless your family is used to moving around, it can be pretty hard on them and even on you and your husband. Our family moved about every other year for the first fourteen years of my life. After a while, I gave up trying to build friendships because the impending move was almost always right around the corner. In the beginning, I thought we moved so much because of something my sister or I had done to upset our parents. Seems silly, but that was in the back of my mind when our mom made the announcement of moving. Once we were older and in high school, we never moved again. Needless to say, it took a while to actually believe it. The one thing that seemed to help is our mom telling us two to three months in advance. This helped to ease part of the anxiety and gave us the chance to research the new area. Try to focus on the fun things that can be done instead of any negatives. - Jennifer Gregory in Columbia, SC
Moving anywhere is never easy, much less out of state and with drastic differences in the weather from what one is used to. There are many things that make up the individual experience of each family member. Since you didn't include the ages of your children, I'm guessing that they're not extremely young or they wouldn't be so upset. Leaving behind friends and family is difficult at any age and some families seek professional counseling before and after they move. Even for those kids that think they want to move and seem amiable toward the idea, the experience can leave them feeling unsettled right before and after. To help eliminate some of the anxiety and stressful feelings, get online and read about topics that are of interest to them and to the family as a whole. However, don't hide certain things about a new city or town, like the cold weather. Instead, let them read about various details and answer any questions to the best of your ability. There are tons of things to do in cold weather, much of which will be new, fun and well worth the experience. Try to stay positive. With all of the current ways to communicate, like social media, cell phones, webcams, etc., there's plenty of choices for the kids to stay connected with family and friends for as long as they choose.
CAN YOU HELP?
Our five-month-old still does not sleep through the night. It is exhausting and we both have to get up to go to work the next day. What are we doing wrong? How can we help him go to sleep and to stay asleep for at least eight hours?
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