By Elisabeth Corcoran
I have a girlfriend whose son is about to undergo heart surgery. He's less than a year and a half old and he is one of those kids that just draws you in, that everyone thinks is simply precious. Seriously, I'm constantly telling him that I just want to eat him up, he is that sweet. Now, I suppose I could be a bit biased, seeing as I love my friend so much that maybe it just overlaps onto her kids or that I had the privilege of being in the delivery room when he was born, but I don't think that's it. In fact, his dad mentioned to me that his father had been praying that people would be drawn to him, and they are.
But now onto his heart. Can you imagine, really, what my friend must be going through? It's coming up in a matter of weeks. I'm trying to put together a little prayer calendar for her with some of her friends each taking a day, and we're getting them some giftcards to restaurants so they don't have to worry about a few meals, but my hands feel tied. I have no idea how to help her handle this. He will more than likely get through this beautifully, but just the waiting and the unknowing before and during and after, the emotions that she must be experiencing are something I'm having a hard time relating to.
Then again, maybe, it's kinda easy to relate. Maybe it's just about the same as not knowing how any given situation is going to play out and when you get to that point of realizing that you have pretty much nothing to do with the outcome, with any outcome of any situation. I think we think this only happens in really big situations or when really bad things happen or when you're left hanging in the balance. But we are being deceived when we think we plan out our day or our week and assume that because we've put some thought to it, that's how it'll turn out. We are not in control of the big things in life, but we're not in control of the little things either.
Sometimes that small fact can tick me off - I want to know that my hard work and organization and type-A status is doing me some good. But if I think about it for just a few moments, I realize that I have no desire really to be in charge of anything. That I'm so grateful that Someone else is in control, even when it doesn't feel like he is. He had things worked out way before I came on the scene and has things pretty much taken care of long past I make my exit. But here's the thing, ladies - we know the very end of the story. All the ups and downs we go through down here - just chapters, not the end all, be all. There will be an eventual happily ever after when all the loose ends get wrapped up, all the questions answered, and all the nonsense will make sense. And that is the bigger hope that we can all hold onto --- no matter what our day is looking like, no matter what situation we're called to walk into, no matter what unknowing we have to wait out.
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